Glad you got home safely and happy for you that your mum is hanging in there. The only thing that I can add us you seem to be trying to justify your decision to go back to others, you don't need to do that you only need to justify your decision to yourself. At the worst it's been a experience lots don't get the chance to even make. You have gave it a go and unfortunately it just has not worked out, the pull of family is a massive thing and we don't know how this will effect us until we are here. Good luck for the future wherever that ends up being and I hope your mum pulls through.