While my wife was in the kitchen cooking breakfast , I suddenly heard a loud thud .
Running in , I found her on the floor DEAD !
Panicking in a blind frenzy I had no idea wot to do .
Then I remembered ,,,,
Ikeas do a cheap brekkie
My mate told me he's thinking of divorcing his wife coz she hasn't spoken to him in 4 months .
I told him to think it over very carefully because ,,,
Women like that are very hard to find !
My mate hired an eastern european cleaner , it took her all day to hoover the lounge .
Turns out she's a Slovak !
One of the seven dwarfs was arrested the other day for having sex with a giraffe .
Apparently the other 6 put him up to it !
If sex amongst 3 people is called a threesome & sex amongst 2 people is called a twosome .
I now understand why they call you Handsome !