Warning!- the following content might offend certain people.
I got a new puppy dog at the weekend he's so cute and has lively colourings, mainly black and tan with a small white area, we call him Birmingham!
I have just had some strobe lights fitted in the bedroom, makes it look as though the wife is moving when we make love!
My horoscope for the year said 'I would come into some money' well would you believe it, but last weekend I had sex with a girl called Penny!
I once met with a couple of Thai girls they said they can make me think I had won the lottery! they were right, when we all stripped off I was shocked to see we had six matching balls!