Wedding rings when separated

[Blossom]

Hello all.

 

I split from my husband not too long ago (my decision). A couple of people have commented on my still wearing my wedding ring. I have changed hands, but I really don't want to take it off.

It was a joint engagement/wedding ring and has a half carot of diamonds and is very pretty. It feels like such a waste to take it off just because we are separated.

What do you all think?

[snifter]

If you want to keep it on, why not. Many often don't but its personal choice IMHO. My mother took hers off and threw it in a kitchen drawer.

 

Going the other way, I've been happily married for over 5 years now and I don't wear a wedding or engagement ring at all, never have.

[obxer7]

My friend split from her fiancé a few years ago. She still wears her engagement ring on her other hand. Same argument, cost a lot of money and she likes it.

If you want to wear it, wear it. x

[Diane]

My friend split from her fiancé a few years ago. She still wears her engagement ring on her other hand. Same argument, cost a lot of money and she likes it.

If you want to wear it, wear it. x

 

Please don't take offence at this question - but isn't it normal to give the engagement ring back when the engagement is broken? Or does that not happen these days when usually both have contributed towards the cost?

[coastie]

My mum pawned hers and bought lotto tickets. Each to there own.

 

(No she didn't win anything)

 

Coastie.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk 2

[Ktee]

Please don't take offence at this question - but isn't it normal to give the engagement ring back when the engagement is broken? Or does that not happen these days when usually both have contributed towards the cost?

I know people who have thrown the ring back at their ex but I don't think it is the norm

[Blossom]

I know people who have thrown the ring back at their ex but I don't think it is the norm

Judge judy always makes them give the ring back if they didn't get as far as marrying. She must be right. ;-)

[obxer7]

Please don't take offence at this question - but isn't it normal to give the engagement ring back when the engagement is broken? Or does that not happen these days when usually both have contributed towards the cost?

 

I think they both contributed to the ring.

[snifter]

I think they both contributed to the ring.

 

I kind of like the idea both contribute. Good idea. Then if anything does happen at least its not one person solely out of pocket or is sold or some such. Beats the guy having to save to buy a ring before proposing. I do wonder how they divide up things like a ring though. I guess either the guy gets some money or simply the woman is left with it as it was for her to wear.

 

I wondered where the whole engagement ring thing came from so I did some reading and while its been a long standing thing, the thing of it being so expensive a purchase and so on is far more recent.

 

As someone who will never wear either engagement or wedding ring I am always a little bemused by the engagement ring thing. I mean, I get it, I just don't get it, IYKWIM. I don't wear jewellery ever so its all lost on me. Lucky for him, hubby knew this before proposing

[Diane]

It's kind of like a ring through the nose isn't it, to show the wearer is already "owned"?!!! Seriously though, the only people I know whose engagement broke up, he had bought the ring so when she decided against going through with it, she gave it back to him - three years later it has finally sold at the jewellers he left it with. I was such a young skinny thing when we got engaged that my actual engagement ring hasn't fitted me for years - I bought myself a replacement when I decided to let my finger grow back to its normal size, have since lost several stones from that so now just wear the wedding ring on its own - which looks slightly odd as the ring was made to fit around the engagement one so it now has a pointless kink in it!

[Blossom]

My grandma always used to tell me that an engagement ring should be a months wage as in 'the olden days' before benefits, if something happened to the man, the woman could sell the ring to help provide for the family. It sounds like it would make sense....

[Guest BurgessFamily]

Keep the ring, it's the sign of commitment.

[star123]

In my much younger and much wilder youth, i actually got engaged 4 yes 4 times, the first ring i kept, cannot even remember what happened to it, i was only 18 tho and then number 2 came along and i did give that back, number 3 came along a few years later, lovely ring, so married number 3 but then got divorced, kept the ring and the wedding ring but when the chips were down, sold them both for a small fortune, then number 4 came along, and so far i still wearing the wedding ring and engagement ring :-) :-)

[DougM]

My first wife and I divorced nearly 40 years ago and it was very acrimonious. Today, she still wears my wedding ring. Go figure. Maybe it stopped her being 'hit on' when out with the girls. She doesn't wear her engagement ring. Probably sold it.

[Keith & Linda]

Maybe you need to change your name to star1234# but really wishing you a long and happy marriage:smile:

[Guest Messua]

It's a personal decision, what you do with your ring. A friend of mine threw her rings into the sea when she got divorced. I would give mine to my children, as stipulated in my will. If you see this item as a pretty ring, rather than a joint engagement/wedding ring, why shouldn't you wear it... assuming your estranged husband doesn't object?

[Keith & Linda]

Gee, has anyone ever had one.... like forever?.............................................................yeh! I know it just seems like forever!!! and me & the wife were happy for 25yrs and then we met! I know, I know!!!

Edited July 29, 2013 by Keith & Linda
need to clrify

[guspjmh]

If you want to keep it on, why not. Many often don't but its personal choice IMHO. My mother took hers off and threw it in a kitchen drawer.

 

Going the other way, I've been happily married for over 5 years now and I don't wear a wedding or engagement ring at all, never have.

 

 

I'm exactly the same; 5 years married and don't wear my wedding ring, I'm not even sure where it is!

[Guest AliinAus]

I agree, if you like it then carry on wearing it.