Grounds for divorce.
Two women meet in the co-op, Hilda says "why so glum pet?" "och , it's ma man" says Mary..."he hasn't spoken to me for a month, and hasn't made love to me for three months"
Hilda say's " so what's up wee him?"
" oh no it's me, somethings no right wee me" says Mary.
Hilda...."hav you checked yersel you know doon there?"
Mary...." don't be daft Hilda ,i'm fat and fifty ..i canna even see it nowadays!"
Hilda....."well do what i do and use a wee mirror the n pet !"
so Mary toddles off home thinkin " i havnae got a wee mirror" ah well nae problem as she lays the bathroom mirror on the floor and stands over it with the perfect view! Just with that her man comes home ,takes one look an throws her to the floor.
" ye bast..rd, firstly ye dinna speak to me ,then ye dinna make love to me and now your beatin me up, ...i want a divorce.."
MAN... "what ye talkin aboot woman, ..i just saved yer life , if you fallen down there you'd hav broken yer neck...!"
sorry folks, i do work on sites.!
I am sure my Glaswegian partner will appreciate it though!!
Be prepared to be misunderstood in Adelaide...He's given up the alcohol as he says having to repeat himself over and over is a sobering experience!!
OMG stu you gonna give up drinking or take elocution lessons!!!!!!!!!!!! hehehe
steph - who did understand the joke!
Yeah Yeah, i do like a tipple.........! good for the circulation. here's a clean one and my fav.....Whats the fastest cake in the world......../???? wait for it.....