I do feel for you. You were brave to tell your family before applying for visa. We have medicals on Monday and I still haven't told my mum, but we do live two hours away and it's something I don't want to say over the phone. She knows that we've always wanted to emigrate, so I'm hoping that she doesn't react too negatively .
But I think you should do what you want to do, because if you don't you may become resentful towards your mum.
Good luck, Heather
I completely get where you are coming from. I have been through the exact same thing over the last 18 months. My mum is devastated and to make things worse we are taking her first grand daughter away who she and my dad adore. It is heartbreaking and I just don't know how I'm gonna get on that plane in September. I think this site is great and really keeps me going.
At times I feel things are getting easier and they are beginning to accept our decision but in reality we are not allowed to talk about the move with them as they get upset and that just makes it harder.
I'm considering taking my mum to a hotel for a night so we can chill out and have a few wines and a good cry. I hate the thought of going without properly having talked over our plans with her!
I will miss them so much and just thinking about it makes me cry on a regular basis (I'm a right softie) but deep down I know it is the right thing to do for my own little family.
Good luck to you and I hope you decide to do the right thing!
It is possibly one of the most heart wrenching things you could ever do to yourself and your family.
Originally Posted by SA Great
I left a my lil boy from a previous relationship back in the yUK and it hurts me so much when i talk to him on the phone or skype.
but the question you have to ask yourself is, not is Adelaide worth all the heartache but is your kids future, a better lifestyle, and all the the reasons you looked at migrating in the first place worth the heartache of leaving friends and family back in the yUK...the only person who can make that decision is yourselves.
We came here and thought if it does fail least we can look back on it in years to come and say well least we ave it a shot.
But here we are, loving it....and starting to build our own place, which we couldn't even dream about doing back in the yUK.
Use this place for all your questions, queries, letting of steam and all things to do with migrating.....the folks on here are awesome they will always give you advice on whatever you ask about..sometimes it may not be what you want to hear but you will get some info.
Hope this helps
Helen i can relate to your situation sooooo much!!!
Originally Posted by TheTodds
Loads of sympathy - going through the same right now, talking is the key. Often it is those left behind who feel hard done by..........despite the fact that, in our case, they did exactly the same thing 30 years ago!!!!
Keep the faith
Hi there, we have only just started the process and i have no other family so for me it will be easy but a diferent story for the wife. Her perents are 78 and 70 and her dad cannot fly so if we get the visa she will be in effect saying goodbye forever to her dad. A massive price to pay for what we think is our future but since out holiday in April she is determined this is what she wants to do. We have not told them yet but in all honesty they are not stupid and know we loved it out there. We will tell them soon so they can get used to it if thats possible. If there was doubts then i think i would have a long hard look at the situation, i wonder what percentage of people who return is down to missing family a big proportion i would guess. If my wife pulled the plug then i could not critisise her as its a dicision i will never have to make (honestly hope she dosent). Only you can answer your doubts and weigh up the pros and cons. Good luck.
Living In Adelaide Since Jan 2012 And Loving It
Hi I am Simons wife, we left the uk 5 years ago and moved to Spain. It was the hardest thing I have ever done leaving everyone you love.
I still remember the morning we left my mums and I felt my heart break into a million peices. I will never forget that feeling as long as I live BUT after time it gets easier, you will always miss your loved ones but you DO get used to it. I suppose you do harden up a little after a while, well you have to really otherwise there is no point in trying your dream.
When we were first in Spain I spent the first 5 months dwelling on all my friends and family back in the uk, then one day I thought ok if we are really going to try this then I have to pull myself together and look at what we have come here for.
Obviously we have made the decision to leave Spain and move to Australia, mainly because of the language but when we made the decision we had a totally different outlook which was, ok what do we all want as a family for us (meaning Simon, me and the kids).
I now feel so excited about moving to Australia and have no fears or worries at all (well apart from the spiders lol). I would not go back to the UK just because of family. They have got used to not having us just around the corner and vice versa. We talk to our families on Skype, I email and keep in touch with friends on facebook.
When we first thought of moving to Spain my brother said to me "try it and if you dont like it then come back, simple" I do appreciate that moving to Spain is cheaper than Oz.
Someone else said to me " if you want to give it a go then take the bull by the horns and do it, if you keep questioning it you will ALWAYS find a reason not to do it.
Also the amount of people here in Spain who have said to us during this whole mind numbing, very expensive, draining, want to pull your hair out application process (that will all be worth it) " oh we wanted to go Oz when we were younger but did not go because of family or because they lost the nerve" it is incredible and they all regret not giving it a go.
Nothing is forever, if you REALLY want to try it then what can it hurt to TRY!!!! Good luck with your decision. x
Last edited by simon from spain; 13-06-2009 at 07:20 PM.
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