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    Thread: doubts


    1. #1

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      doubts

      Hi all, our timeline is in our signature.

      After all this time and planning i now have doubts.
      My sister called me last night and revealed she is pregnant.
      I am the eldest of 7 but am only close to 1 of my sisters(the pregnant 1) and 1 brother, i am not close to my parents(long story!).
      I had always believed we were making the right move for us and our children but now emotionally i'm a wreck.
      I always knew we'd miss family and my sister is my best friend but the thought of not being here for her is breaking my heart.
      Is this normal or do you think i should delay the move?

      Vikki
      Last edited by vikkiann; 29-07-2008 at 09:05 AM.

    2. #2

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      Vikki it is normal to have doubts. We all want what is best for our family but we have to make sacrifices in order to get the better life that we hope for. We have just booked our flights (last night about midnight while very drunk) terrified now still having doubts but hope to be posting anniversary post in 12 months saying how well we have settled
      why not rent out your house so you have something to come back to if you really cannot settle in oz?
      Your sister might even want to join you in adelaide
      all the work you have done towards getting your visa etc means you have to at least give it a go. Don't live to regret not going good luck sue

    3. #3

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      sue is right vick dont give up now its such a hard road to go down
      go over and give it a go worst thing that can happen is you come back again
      i know how you feel about your family, i aint close to my mum or 3 sisters i have(love them dont get me wrong) but they wouldnt keep me here.
      i love my brother so much and will miss him so much
      but he knows we are going coz of our kids and he can come over if he misses us that much
      have a good think about it gurl

      suexxx

    4. #4
      LOOBYLOO
      I agree with previous posts. Some days I am really positive and then I get the wobbles. My sister wouldn't mention the 'A' word until recently but she now accepts that we are going (hopefully) and talks about visiting us etc. Keep your chin up!

    5. #5

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      I don't have a relationship with my mum - long story. My father died 3 years ago. My brother is a d*ckhead who can talk about the importance of family but knows nothing of the realities i.e. it helps to phone/ visit/ email someone once in a while, and certainly more often than once every 18 months.

      After dad died, my sister and I worked really hard to make a relationship with each other work, bearing in mind she was on one wide of the country and I on the other. I miss her like I can't tell you.

      She told me she was pregnant 2 months after we put in the visa application. I hadn't said anything to our families as I wanted to see if we could meet the deadlines first. Once I found out she was pregnant, my plans did not change.

      I love her, she loves me, but she has a family of her own and she has to do what is right for them. Just as I do what is right for mine. I won't say it has been easy to watch my nieces grow up over Skype during the last 15 months but I am going to see her in Sept and it will be lovely. She is soooooooooo excited that she will be able to see our new home here next year when the kids are easier to travel with, and she loves being able to tell friends and family that her sister lives in Australia. She wants to come and see what life we have with a view to moving here herself - RESULT!!!!!! She is amazingly proud of me - don't know why - for doing this.

      Our relationship has changed...when I can see her on a computer screen and she says she is fine and I can SEE she isn't, it is great to be able to challenge her and get her to tell me what is really going on. Our relationship has got better rather than worse...I felt guilty that she was so upset when we left but she and I talk far more than we did when we were in the UK. We are closer now, believe it or not. We'll probably ending up fighting within 10 mins once we get together

      My personal view is that you should come here, try it and then decide about how your relationship with your sister develops.

    6. #6

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      Thank you for all of your replies.
      Deep down i think we are making the right move.
      I have 4 children and my sister was there during each pregnancy and at hospital within hours of them being born, i just feel guilty that i can't do the same.
      However i do need to put my family first and living in England is awful!

     

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