The worse day of my life

[janice1uk]

We fly to tomorrow to our new life in Adelaide. The thing is I am leaving 3 older children and 5 grandchildren behind. My 4 younger children are coming with us. I have cried all day. Picking the children up from there last day at school was bad enough. Some of my son friends (8 year olds) were heart broken and begging me to let him stay which was heartbreaking. Then tonight saying bye to my two daughters and their children, someone may has well just ripped out my heart out. Why am I doing this I am sat here asking myself. My son didn't come to say goodbye as he said he could not handle it. So I'm sat here sobbing. I know it's going to be hard I just underestimated how hard it was going to be saying goodbye.

[RobJ1978]

((((((hugs))))))) think i might do a midnight flit!

[bidsandrew]

It is so hard but if its what you want then it will be so worth it. I have not left any children in the UK but I can only imagine the pain that you must be feeling. I know my mum left my brother in South Africa when we moved to the UK 15 years ago and she said that the heartache was almost unbearable. My parents did it for me and to give me a better life and I can say that it was the best thing they every did. I had an amazing 15 years in the UK.

Picking my kids up from school was so hard too, again I didnt realise how hard all the goodbyes were going to be but I bet if you talk to anyone on here or anyone who has done it they will say the same so you are not alone. there seems to be quite a few people who are leaving older children behind so maybe one of them can offer you some reassurance.

You will be fine im sure and the lifestyle here is amazing and will be great for your younger ones. will your older children and grandchildren maybe join you one day?

I really do feel for you and I hope your son does manage to say a goodbye to you. You will both regret it if you dont and yes it will be tough and maybe he is "punishing" you for leaving but you should really encourage him to come and say goodbye.

Have a safe flight!

Bridget

[Tamara (Homes Down Under)]

I am so sorry to hear this. It is such a rollercoaster of emotion.
Leaving friends and family behind is just so difficult and you do question whether it's the right move. The move can cause such rifts in families and I hope that it doesn't occur within your family. My own father left the UK many years ago with myself and my brother when we were children and his father never forgave him. He was always great with me and his great granchildren though.
My own daughter left 13 weeks ago with the three grandchildren so I have experience of the pain on both sides.

i know that it's small consolation but the world is a smaller place with video skype and instant communication...I hope that you have the strength to get through this difficult and stressful period.

my thoughts are with you.

Tamara

[Diane]

The English language lets us down sometimes - we really need the equivalent of "au revoir". Goodbyes are never easy but just keep focussing on the reasons you decided to do this in the first place and try to force your mind to look forwards, not backwards. Everyone that matters to you will still be there, you will still see them and talk to them often, albeit maybe through Skype rather than face to face... take it one day at a time, it does get better, I promise you!

[Adelaide_bound]

Try and remember the reasons you wanted to move in the first place, it might help a little. I know its hard, but there must be some good reasons, or you wouldn't be going (either that or you are a bit mental :P ).

Australia isn't a black hole - yes it is a very long plane flight, but its only that - a looong plane ride to see people in the flesh. Its not a box you aren't allowed out of, and its not a jail where no-one is allowed to visit.

I'm sure you thought long and hard about this all through the process, so go back to your original thoughts, and take comfort in the right you are doing and that its not the end of things, just a new shiny start - if nothing ever changed life would be very very deathly dull after all (and that is a stubborn change hating through and through Taurean saying that, so it must have some truth in it lol).

Chin up, worse things happen at sea and remind yourself you will see them lots, on Skype and in person, and there are good reasons why you are going.

Hugs xx

[thebacons]

Aw Janice. Things will get better and they will visit. Time is a great healer and Skype is great for keeping in touch. Remember why you are doing this and keep focused.

See you over here, the Bacons.

[snifter]

Awww I don't have words. It must be so so hard.

Have some virtual hugs and look forward, not back, where possible. As has been said, there is Skype, letters, email and visits. I know its not the same as being with them, but if they are all older and out living their lives, try to take comfort in the knowledge you played the most important part in them getting there, doing that and you'll always be their Mum and Gran, no matter where you are.

[dalton]

I so know how you are feeling ,it is soooo painful leaving your family and friends you do think what on earth am i doing ???? but once you are on that plane you have to look forward to your new life in Adelaide !!! we have been here since September and i have got to say skype and facetime is just great to keep in touch its definately a lifeline !!! so big hug and good luck you will be all fine i'm sure Cathy x

[laura girling]

The pain and heart ache will be raw for a while, then you will be so busy, getting the kids sorted in schools ,finding a home ect, then when you have settled yourselves you'll begin to chillax, your children will visit you and I bet one by one they'll not want to return to the Uk and they will emigrate too, and also what a great example of a strong Mother you are a great role model for your kids, showing them you can do this, well done.
Ps I had a little tear reading your letter, big hugs to you, if you need a shoulder to cry on when you get here, look us up xxxx