Guest cazandbrad

feelings :/

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    Guest cazandbrad

    will start using this site properly soon

    just wondering has anyone else ever felt like "why am i doing this, my life's good here, is it going to be worth transferring every item in my house across the other side of the world, taking my kids from their nans and grandads, their friends, my high school friends ive known for years, what if Australia doesnt live up to everything

     

    it doesnt feel like cold feet it just feels like is there any point?

    just needed to get my feelings out

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    Guest cunnah10
    will start using this site properly soon

    just wondering has anyone else ever felt like "why am i doing this, my life's good here, is it going to be worth transferring every item in my house across the other side of the world, taking my kids from their nans and grandads, their friends, my high school friends ive known for years, what if Australia doesnt live up to everything

     

    it doesnt feel like cold feet it just feels like is there any point?

    just needed to get my feelings out

    You are NOT alone asking yourself this....sooo many people do...me being one of them!I was on a huge guilt trip from the beginning and unfortunately due to a whole lot of circumstances i returned back to the UK with my husband & 4 kids just over 5 months after arriving in Adelaide!

    Such a HUGE decision AND i have been told you have to be 110% committed from the beginning!

    good luck

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    just wondering why you would want to up root everyone if your life is all good.if you cant improve dont bother to move.as said above if not fully commited its a expensive adventure.all the best cheers mark.

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    Guest Woody and Jane

    Just do it ! its the scope for so much improvement yeah? its the society,culture,lifestyle, we can always come back baby ! you won't, but if you want to you can... nothing lost nothing gained...........

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    Hi CazandBrad,

    I don't think you are alone by any means!

     

    I don't believe everyone who moves here does so because their life in the UK needs improving. Ours certainly didn't - it was my OH's dream; one that the kids fancied giving a go...so we did! We didn't reccie (no money lol) and I didn't bother researching because it wasn't my dream. That might sound pretty naive/stupid but the reason we moved everything and everyone to the opposite side of the world was because....we fancied giving it a go! And although it must be good to be even 100% committed, I wasn't - except to the dreams of my family.

     

    In the years since, our life has returned to the way it was in the UK in that we have a house, friends, our kids are happy at schools that fulfill their needs but now it only takes me 15 minutes to get to the beach! Not really better, just every bit as good.

     

    I do think it's mad to transfer your whole life on a whim - however well researched and thought out. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't do it. Or that you should.:huh: There is nothing wrong with questioning your original motives. That just sounds intelligent to me. I hear that some people come over here on a reccie and decide it's not for them, or make the move and decide it hasn't added anything extra to their life. It's all good and what works for one might not work for another.

     

    Have I ever regretted the move? No. Would any one of us go back? No! Is our life better? Hmmn, a hard one. All I know is we're all happy and that's what counts. You could say that life is too short not to test yourself a bit, push your comfort zone etc...or you could say that life's too short to waste any of it being miserable for no real gain.

     

    I don't know, but good luck. Take all the time you need, South Australia is going to be here a loooong time.

    :wubclub: LC

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    Guest Guest75

    Caz - it's natural to have doubt,we would not be human otherwise.

     

    I'll back Lazy Cow's wise words.

     

    I'm not just saying "Come on in"

     

    You have to have reasons ,strong ones to both leave the UK and to settle here.

     

    Adelaide does grow on you, we love coming "home" to Adelaide:):)

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    Guest kangomik

    i would take a serious look at your reasons for starting the process.

    It's a long way to come and then go back.

    If you have good earnings in the UK and a good quality of life then take stock of that situation.

     

    We all have a real thought, especially once the visa is approved. Thats only natural in my opinion.

     

    For us, so far, the adventure has been great, the kids get so much more here i think. But missing family is hard.

     

    Cheers

     

    Mik

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    Guest cazandbrad

    Thanks for replying, I had just dropped the kids off with their aunty and cousins for the night and my sister said We wont be doing this for longer, she didnt mean it in a nasty way but it really made me think,

    When i said life is good, i sort of meant average, my town is averge, kids schools are ok not anything amazing.

    The reasons for going are for a better life, me and my husband are really relaxed people and when we came over to oz 9 or 10 years ago we just clicked here, I dont really like what england is turning into but thats my opinion, the weather is awful in england our family comes alive when we go abroad in the sun! We havnt got a huge family, ive 1 sister, oh is only child,so were not taking the kids away from several cousins,auntys etc...

    And why not? our life is so repeatative, boring, stressful I know theres still going to be boring housework etc but the beaches,new cities, new people

    Thank you for listening to me, its much appreciated,

    Caz :)

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    Guest kangomik

    I reckon you may just like it then, specially if you have been before.

    We never did that, just arrived blind with kids in tow.

    At our leaving doo, people thought we were nuts, we did not even know where we would be staying as we were hoping for OAA. We knew no one here, and had no jobs.

    13 months later, both work, kids love school. Haven't been the beach in a while due to the rain and moving into our new home. We will make up for that soon once we have explored the new area.

     

    Our life in the UK was mediocre, its was just existance, or survival. Here its more enjoyable, more relaxed, and you feel better.

     

    It's not a bed of roses, but we like it so far.

     

    What have you got to loose?

     

    Cheers

    Mik

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    Guest cazandbrad

    Mik, that is exactly how i feel here in the UK! and exactly its been a dream for a few years and i know that in several years if we dont go i will regret it so so so much!

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    Guest mayjess

    Speaking from personal opinions, think its more a case of becoming stagnent, once your life becomes same thing day in day out, thats when you start thinking ``there must be more to life than this``, but saying that once you move to OZ it can become stagnent there also, unless you make the most of the fine weather and beautiful beaches. The main reasons for us wanting to return is that we have very little we can do if its lashing down with rain outside day in day out, puts you in a depressing mood anyhow.plus I like a challenge and making new friends,- its the right thing to do if your all up for that challenge!

     

    Mayjess

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    Guest Jon T

    Caz,

     

    My wife and our two kids moved to Adelaide in 2004 because we had (distant) relatives living here. We came for a better life for us and the kids. We had OK jobs and a nice house before we left. Looking back I'm not sure I know why we moved. Just knew there had to be something better out there and Australia seemed like a pretty good place to go look for it.

     

    I promised my wife that if she was not happy after a year we would move home and, true to my word we did. She missed her family a lot, particularly her mum and felt it difficult to click with Australians. (Both our daughters didn't want to leave)

     

    We quickly fell back into our old lives and returned to our old jobs/schools. 4/5 weeks after we got home, about the time the novelty wore off, both my wife and I realised we had made a mistake. Nothing had changed and while it was lovely to have family support we all missed the life and friends we had made in Adelaide.

     

    We moved back here 2005 and are now very happy. We have great friends here (both from the UK and Australia) and have grabbed the opportunity with both hands. Whether it is better than what we had at home, I'm not sure. There are so many great things about home and it takes a long time to replace those childhood friendships you leave behind. Although my wife still misses her mum and I still have days where I wonder what I'm doing here, life in Adelaide is good.

     

    Overall the move made us realise that to be happy you must move forward in life. Whether Adelaide is the place for you to do this, only you will know.

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    Guest mayjess

    I think its brilliant when those who have come back to the UK decide to give it another go, because your facing your fears by returning, and becoming aware that we only have one life and its not the end of the world if you go a 2nd time then come bk the UK AGAIN,, I am made up that its worked out good for you, and good on ya for giving it a 2nd go!

     

    Mayjess

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    Guest thekings

    A lot of the thoughts here echo ours.

     

    Our attitude is you only live once and you are a long time dead, sorry if that upsets anyone. Since telling people of our decision we've lost track of how many people are envious (in a nice way), envious (in not such a nice way, jealousy we think) and even more who have said "I had the opportunity once and didn't take it, wish I had". this last one came from all sets of parents and one set of grandparents!!! amongst others. Makes us wonder if it is our destiny and always has been.

     

    If it doesn't work for us (& it may not) at least we can say we tried it but it wasn't for us.

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    Guest graandjac

    To say that most people have your thoughts would be an understatement, as i think that everyone has at some point, its a crazy thing to do :shocked:think about it move your life to the other side of the world and start again.......but its something inside all of us who have done it, something that most people dont have....what it is i dont know .....!!!, bigger ba**s the ability to stepout of the box, move out of your comfort zone.

     

    And even the people who (fail is the wrong word)didnt take to Adelaide or emigrating as a whole, still gave it their best shot, they still had the gumption to give it a go, but make no mistake it takes 110% effort. Problems will and do crop up its how you tackle them that gets you through. Good luck;)

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    A lot of the thoughts here echo ours.

     

    Our attitude is you only live once and you are a long time dead, sorry if that upsets anyone.

     

    If it doesn't work for us (& it may not) at least we can say we tried it but it wasn't for us.

     

    Whilst still in England, we thought just like you.

     

    Have to say though, here and nearly 2 years on, and the jury is still out :err: We came with the attitude that nothing is irreversible and it is better to take a risk than wonder "what if". BUT we are fortunate and could move back relatively easily should we choose, some people end up 'trapped' financially which must be very difficult.

     

    Some people love it from the minute they land, others take a while to settle, others a lot longer, some never, and I don't think you can know which of these people you will be till you actually do it.

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    Guest cazzie

    I think this thread is great and what PIA is all about (apart from a good debate!). I remember being in the UK and wondering how I would feel in Adelaide and you really can't imagine it until you are here. I really hated it for the first four months and felt very anti.I missed my fabulous family like crazy and I still have my homesick moments ten months in, but really and truly I am beginning to settle now. I think it is definitely worth the risk. It IS beautiful here and if you come from somewhere like Corby like Bill and I do, then there is just no comparison. I love the view of the beach from Ocean Boulevard - it lifts my soul every time I see it. I love the warmer weather and the relaxed feel of it all and I'm so glad that I did have the courage to try another life. It doesn't have to be forever either and the UK will always be an option if you want to go back. Good luck.

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    Guest cazandbrad

    Jon T

    I think we are going to say the same as you, if we don't like it after 2 years were going to get pr if possible then come home. At least you know the good and bad points of both england and Adelaide now as sometimes when you have lived in England your whole life you forget the good points and just moan about the bad points!

     

    Mayjess

    Yes stagnant is a very good word to describe England, but having lived in England for 34 years and still not been to loads of attractions here I'm guessing theres going to beaches, attractions, zoo's in Adelaide that I will still not have been to in 10 years so there's always going to be somewhere in Adelaide new! And yes you need a challenge in life at the mo I'm thinking what doesn't kill you makes you stronger!

     

    TheKings

    Yes my grandad and nan were on their way to Australia Perth i think with my dad who would of been 6 or 7 when my grandad was suddenly offered a job in England so they never went. They had always wanted to go there but never went. Their both 90 now so i don't think they will be visiting, I feel like I am kind of living their dream for them! The weird thing is my other nan and grandad also applied to get in Australia but were rejected as my mum is blind.

     

    Graandjac

    Yes when i told friends they looked at me like i was crazy, i think a lot of them don't think it will ever materialise. I just reckon its jealousy!

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    Guest countdown1975
    just wondering why you would want to up root everyone if your life is all good.if you cant improve dont bother to move.as said above if not fully commited its a expensive adventure.all the best cheers mark.

     

    I agree with this point - we don't have a life here in ireland and so that is a major factor for us in moving to Australia. A lot of people say to us we are doing the right thing moving now because the country is just going downhill but then you get the poeple who I think deep down are jealous that we have actually bothered to do anything about our situation unlike them constantly moaning and are trying to put us off (not going to work)

    Life is too short to be miserable and full of regrets so we are just going for it and hopefully everything will work out - POSITIVE ATTITUDE :-)

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