Guest Guest75

Moving back to Adelaide.

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    Guest Guest75

    :biglaugh:

     

    Kids - this is an MA post - if you can join the dots up.

     

    Had to post this - sorry if anyone is offended,hope the asterisks work:swoon:...........................................................................................................

     

    Snow, Snow, Thick Thick Snow

     

     

     

     

    DEC 16th

     

    It's starting to snow. The first of the season and the first we've

     

    seen for years. The wife and I took our hot toddies and sat on the porch

     

    watching the fluffy snow flakes drift gently down clinging to the trees

     

    and covering the ground. It's so beautiful and peaceful.

     

     

     

    DEC 17th.

     

    We awoke to a lovely blanket of crystal white glistening snow

     

    covering as far as the eye could see. What a fantastic sight, every tree

     

    and bush covered with a beautiful white mantle. I shovelled snow for the

     

    first time ever and loved it. I did both our driveway and pavement.

     

     

     

    Later that day a snowplough came along and accidentally covered up

     

    our driveway with compacted snow from the street. The driver smiled and

    waved. I waved back and shovelled it away again. The children next door

     

    built a snowman with coal for eyes and a carrot for a nose, and had a

     

    snowball fight, a couple just missed me and hit the car so I threw a

     

    couple back and joined in their fun.

     

     

     

    DEC 18th.

     

    It snowed an additional 5 inches last night and the temperature

     

    dropped to around minus 8 degrees. Several branches on our trees and

     

    bushes snapped due to the weight of snow. I shovelled our driveway again.

    Shortly afterwards the snowplough came by and did his trick again. Much of

     

    the snow is now a brownish-grey.

     

     

     

    Dec 19th.

     

    Warmed up enough during the day to create some slush which soon

     

    became ice when the temperature dropped again. Bought snow tyres for both

     

    our cars £500. Fell on my a*se in the driveway. £100 to a physio but nothing

    was broken.

     

     

     

    DEC 20th.

     

    Still cold. Sold the wife's car and bought her a 4x4 to get her to

     

    work. She slid into a wall and did considerable damage to the right wing -

     

    £200. Had another 8 inches of white sh*te last night. Both vehicles are

     

    re-covered in salt and iced up slush. That b*stard snowplough came by

     

    twice today. Where's that bl*ody shovel.

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

    DEC 21st

     

    More F*****G snow. Not a tree or bush in our property that hasn't

     

    been damaged. Power was off most of the night. Tried to keep from freezing

     

    to death with candles and a paraffin heater which tipped over and nearly

     

    torched the house. I managed to put the flames out but suffered 2nd degree

     

    burns on my hands. Lost all my eye brows and eyelashes. Car hit a F*****G

     

    deer on the way to casualty and was written off.

     

     

     

     

     

    DEC 22nd

     

    F*****G B*****D white sh*te just keeps on coming down. Have to put on

     

    every article of clothing just to go to the post box. The little C***S

     

    next door ambushed me with snowballs on the way back - I'll shove that

     

    carrot so far up the little pr*cks a*se it'll take a good surgeon 6 hours

     

    to find it. If I ever catch the a*sehole that drives the snowplough I'll

     

    chew open his chest and rip out his heart with my teeth. I think the

     

    B*****D hides round the corner and waits for me to finish shovelling and

     

    then he accelerates down the street like Michael F*****G Schumacher and

     

    buries the F*****G driveway again.

     

     

     

     

     

    DEC 23rd

     

    16 more sodding inches of F*****G snow and F*****G ice and F*****G

     

    sleet and god knows what other white sh*te fell last night. I am in court

     

    in 3 months time for assaulting the snowplough driver with an ice pick.

     

    Can't move my F*****g toes. Haven't seen the sun for 5 weeks. Minus 20 and

     

    more F*****G snow forecast F**K THIS, I'M MOVING BACK TO

    ADELAIDE!!!! .

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    Guest cornish Busdriver

    LOL LOL LOL LOL

    LOVE IT :)

    I dont miss the snow and cold one little bit, One of the reasons we moved here.

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    LOL LOL LOL LOL

    LOVE IT :)

    I dont miss the snow and cold one little bit, One of the reasons we moved here.

     

    I didn't mind the snow but despised the dark and damp. As some have said to us, you get to Adelaide and it's like someone turned the lights on:)

     

    Cooler

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    Guest Team 'W'

    What an absolute star you are!!!! this was brilliant ssoooo funny.

    Sounded a bit like me two weeks ago**??**.

    When i thought i was goin back..lol

    TYKE:THANKS this was cool....

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    Guest guest3462

    Absolute class!!! Really cheered me up after -------------------------has riled me on another thread!!! Thankyou xxx

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    Guest andylynnchriskirst

    What a great post, very funny, will print this off and show mates down the pub.:biglaugh:

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    Guest kangomik

    you guys need to read the one about the pom who saw a job advertised north of Perth, along the same lines but involves flies.

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    Guest Guest75
    you guys need to read the one about the pom who saw a job advertised north of Perth, along the same lines but involves flies.

     

    I've got the one about the Pom here and the heat somewhere--------------- I'll dig it out:biglaugh::biglaugh:

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