Fast falling out of love with it all.

[Guest guest3462]

Seriously thinking of going home. Totally fed up of being pissed about and treated like some second class citizen by some faceless git in an office. Kick in the teeth after kick in the teeth is all we get and really, Australia is not worth it. Yes the weather is better and the social apsects are better and the country is beautiful, but what about our mental wellbeing and feeling of belonging?

In all honesty I have tried so very hard this last 2 years to remain optimistic and maintain my deep love for Australia but it is becoming too hard for me to bear anymore. I am sitting here in tears writing this as I just don't know what to do. We have given up absolutely everything to be here and the chances of Rich getting his old UK job back are zero which leaves him professionally right up **** creek.

 

Today I spoke to immigration as I haven't replied to an email we sent 3 weeks ago. They have kindly informed us that we sent some docs that cannot be used, that our form 1100 is invalid and that they havent recieved information from us, even though we have emails from them stating they have recieved them. The promise of a case officer this year has been put back to 2012 by which time our 457 visa will have run out.

 

Today is a bad day. I am lost and in pieces. Will things ever be good for our family? We are good, kind people who work hard and have committed to Australia in every way possible, but when you get nothing but negativity in return it seems hardly worth the effort.

 

I am sorry to everyone who is trying hard to be positive and usually I am the one up there believing things will work, and it is all worth it. Chin up guys im sure god only craps on one family at a time and this lifetime its us.

[suzer]

Don't be sorry - it all gets too much for most of us at one time or another. My first 2 years really sucked...until I found the right job and gave up thinking marriage meant every night should be date night. Are you both working or having difficulty with that - not sure about what your forms mean as I was on a different visa.

[Guest clare]

I'm really sorry to hear that your in pieces things do seem tuff out here for a lot of people! dont know what to say to you, just wanted you to know that thinking of you and im really sorry that things are so crap for you! not very usefull as dont understand visa type etc sorry

[lorluc]

Australia is not worth it. Yes the weather is better and the social apsects are better and the country is beautiful, but what about our mental wellbeing and feeling of belonging?

 

I have followed your posts on here alot, and its been a roller coaster for you....I so agree with your comments above....you do have to wonder sometimes if it is really worth it all...have had that feeling many a time, i can assure you...even though we were lucky to get a perm visa straight off and a now citizens!

 

I have been here 5 years, and there have been plenty of times that we have considered going back...i think if it wasn't for the kids, who going back to England now, would be like emigrating all over again...and other commitments we have here...it would be a big consideration for us!

 

I dont hate it here but i dont love it either........

 

You say your husband couldnt get his old job back? do you mean the 'actual' job he had or could he not apply somewhere else???

 

I really do feel for you...as you obviously dont want to go back, but feel you have no choice...

 

 

Good luck with it all.........

[Guest Anne29]

Seriously thinking of going home. Totally fed up of being pissed about and treated like some second class citizen by some faceless git in an office. Kick in the teeth after kick in the teeth is all we get and really, Australia is not worth it. Yes the weather is better and the social apsects are better and the country is beautiful, but what about our mental wellbeing and feeling of belonging?

In all honesty I have tried so very hard this last 2 years to remain optimistic and maintain my deep love for Australia but it is becoming too hard for me to bear anymore. I am sitting here in tears writing this as I just don't know what to do. We have given up absolutely everything to be here and the chances of Rich getting his old UK job back are zero which leaves him professionally right up **** creek.

 

Today I spoke to immigration as I haven't replied to an email we sent 3 weeks ago. They have kindly informed us that we sent some docs that cannot be used, that our form 1100 is invalid and that they havent recieved information from us, even though we have emails from them stating they have recieved them. The promise of a case officer this year has been put back to 2012 by which time our 457 visa will have run out.

 

Today is a bad day. I am lost and in pieces. Will things ever be good for our family? We are good, kind people who work hard and have committed to Australia in every way possible, but when you get nothing but negativity in return it seems hardly worth the effort.

 

I am sorry to everyone who is trying hard to be positive and usually I am the one up there believing things will work, and it is all worth it. Chin up guys im sure god only craps on one family at a time and this lifetime its us.

 

If I were in your shoes, the first thing that I would do is print off those emails from immigration saying that they received your docs and take them into immigration to show that they responded. This may not achieve anything apart from clear the fact that they did actually respond.

 

Why have they put your case officer back to 2012? Sorry, I don't know anything about your visa, that's why I ask.

 

I've been in a similar boat recently, not visa wise, but careerwise and like you, I just feel like booking a single flight back home and never returning. IT sometimes feels like we have to fight for everything in this country to have it thrown back in our faces. Not trying to upset you even more, just trying to let you know that I know exactly how you feel. The only thing that's kept me going is my fiance - he's been my rock.

 

I'm sending you a virtual *hug.* Today, take a step back, get out of the house (if you're not at work) go for a walk on the beach. Do anything to take your mind off it today. You may see things differently with a clearer mind

[Diane]

I really feel for you, you've really had it rough the last few months and I'm amazed you've managed to stay as positive as you have up till now!

 

Everything Lorraine has said above applies to us as well - once you've been here for a few years with older kids it does get really hard to ever be able to move back. For us, we came out with a job for my other half, which he has subsequently been made redundant from, and hasn't been able to get back into the same industry (the same would have probably happened in the UK though, as motor manufacturing around the world has been in the doldrums).

 

It means that the money coming in now is hugely different to what we anticipated, and both kids are at a private school with fees to pay, albeit halved as they got scholarships, but still money that has to be found from a much smaller pot. We haven't yet got to the point of looking at moving them from the school, but if things don't look up it may well happen.

 

So you shift your family half way round the world, deal with all the family guilt that entails, and then end up with more grief and hassle to deal with, and no-one other than your direct family members to help you through it emotionally. It certainly isn't easy and I've got to the point sometimes where I want to post on here telling people it's just not worth it.

 

I really hope it's just the end-of-winter grumps and that things will start to look up when the weather improves. For us it's a case of we've made our bed, now we have to lie on it, but I hope things get better for you guys - at least with the ages of your kids it won't be too major an impact on their lives, whatever happens.

 

Chin up, and keep fighting.

[Guest Guest75]

I can only second the sentiments of the previous posters.

Dammit! Why is it so hard for you??

You come here with all good intentions and skills.

 

Chin up,if anyone deserves to stay here it is you guys.

 

<<<<<<<<<<<< Man Hug>>>>>>>>>

[Guest kfoley0681]

so so sorry to read your post im always so enlightened by your positive posts as we have had a hard time and sometimes that we are fighting a never ending battle!!! we to have felt like giving up at times after 2 years of paperwork and thousands of pounds we did get a permanant visa. but so much red tape with husband had his own business back in uk got the visa on the back of this then got here and he had to go to tafe to get a licence just to work for an employer and will have to do a 2 year course to get the licence to work for himself!!then theres all the usual crap wages for job he been in years he earns in awhole day here what he earnt in an hour back in uk alsmost! as well as the red tape that we all keep hitting our heads against!! then my husband was in a car accident nearly lost his life as to which the hospital discharged him the next day saying he was fine really strange as in so much pain after fighting as we feel we have done after 8 months and private treatment the hospital has admitted they made a mistake he had brooken ribs a collaped lung with the calvitly full of bloodand crushed ankles! he kept working with all this as the hospital kept saying hes alright!! now they decided to treat him and as its so late it intense everyday treatment he they gets fired from work as had so much time off for hospital! great 4 kids an $800 a fortnight morgage a sick hubby AND NO INCOME!! fighted centrelink for 3 weeks to get something as we have now totally spent all our savings to suvive! my list goes on put it this way on monday i fort between 9am until 3.45 constantly with the great south australians lol!! oh well ive had my moan and to top it all i went to the doctor and said im so stressed i can hardly breath and he said we could start having internal examinations to see what wrong!!! i know what it is dont waste my time with all the bs as its the bs thats making me like this!!!!! but after all that we have gone through and feel like they dont want us here really im not giving up without a fight i came here to start a new life and im not giving up yet dont give up in what you belive in and set out to do constant phone calls is all they understand here the constant bugging clearly annoye sthem enough to move you on quicker just keep copies of everything you do for evidence and just remember what doesnt kill you only makes you stronger!!!!!!!!!!

[Guest Trakki]

I agree with what has already been said, print off all the emails and personnally take them to immigration and ask to know what is going on, they are mucking you around something chronic and its just not fair, why won't you have a co until 2012, seems along way off to be saying that especially as your current visa will be expired, write down everything you want to talk to them about and see what happens, maybe it would help if Rich phoned as he may have a bit more luck, I know its a cliche but sometimes a mans voice works wonders, if not giuve me their phone number and I will make Niamhtalk to them, they will give you the visa just to shut her up!

[taffordbark]

Also sorry to hear things are going pear shaped and you are feeling soooooo down! Things seem to be such a battle here...... one thing after another! We are over on permanent visa (sponsorship) but my OH is treated like a YTS skivvy by his boss! Works for small family business......he gets no overtime, no incentive and is on a rubbish wage - very rarely has a lunch hour... but he refuses to go on sick even though he is stressed up to the eyeballs which affects not only him but the household and the family....we are tip-toeing around on eggshells! whereas in the UK we were living a good life and Hubby had his own business - only a small business like but we were very comfortable. We came here also for a new start......and the kids have settled really well into High School...they are our inspiration! However, new twist today - he has resigned....so we may be hoofed out once we get reported........... all part of the fun of life hey!

 

If we are still here after 2 years........we are sure things can only get better! All in all we are happy with Adelaide........but things do seem to be such an uphill struggle......it getting difficult to carry the load!!

 

Thinking of you guys - Churchj1

[adelaidenow]

resigned?

 

Good job he finished his last job!

[lorluc]

It certainly isn't easy and I've got to the point sometimes where I want to post on here telling people it's just not worth it.

 

 

Oh same here Diane....many times I have wanted to post that!!! Only today i have heard of another family returning to the UK....a friend of my daughter....the stresses of emigrating are not to be underestimated.....I am convinced that my husbands health scare last year, was down to the stresses and strains of emigrating...and believe me, as a family we have been though some s**t here! I know its few years after we had done it...but it accumulates i reckon...until you just cant take much more!!!!!

 

I still think we are better of here.......doesnt sound like there is much to offer any of us going back to the Uk at the moment.......

[Guest guest3462]

I know what you are saying lorluc and believe me truthfully the last thing we want is to go back, but if things don't improve soon we are both going to have a nervous breakdown, then it really would be situation critical.

Just spent the last several hours on the phone to the dept who have admitted and corrected several errors and they are now requesting that the form 1100 be resent (they say it was never recived in the first place but we have an email reciept to say it was) The only trouble with that is that now SA state sponsorship are saying that the 30 timeframe has lapsed and they cannot send the form 1100 and we will need to reapply. I am waiting for a phonecall from the mamager of SA ss to verify this as I strongly believe that we have every right to retain our sponsorship as we fulfilled ll criteria set our by them in the first place.

If they refuse and we have to pay for another application then it is definatley game over for the churches as we cannot and will not keep giving out to get nothing back and we will return to the UK.

I am so confused and upset, almost ready to enter the anger stage!! Wish us luck we need it!!!

[adelaidenow]

I was just saying to Mr Taffordbark yesterday, how i keep out of Visa threads as I know nothing about Visas. I feel for you all I was lucky as I came on a spouse visa.

 

Easy to say I know, but f you want to be here, and can keep your head above water, a few years of misery and frustration is worth it for 30+ years of happiness I guess.

[Guest The Dimmocks]

Sorry to hear your getting more knock backs Julia. Hope you manage to resolve it all.

 

Lots of Hugs from us xx

 

Michelle x

[Guest Anne29]

I know what you are saying lorluc and believe me truthfully the last thing we want is to go back, but if things don't improve soon we are both going to have a nervous breakdown, then it really would be situation critical.

Just spent the last several hours on the phone to the dept who have admitted and corrected several errors and they are now requesting that the form 1100 be resent (they say it was never recived in the first place but we have an email reciept to say it was) The only trouble with that is that now SA state sponsorship are saying that the 30 timeframe has lapsed and they cannot send the form 1100 and we will need to reapply. I am waiting for a phonecall from the mamager of SA ss to verify this as I strongly believe that we have every right to retain our sponsorship as we fulfilled ll criteria set our by them in the first place.

If they refuse and we have to pay for another application then it is definatley game over for the churches as we cannot and will not keep giving out to get nothing back and we will return to the UK.

I am so confused and upset, almost ready to enter the anger stage!! Wish us luck we need it!!!

 

Stand your ground on this one, they are in the wrong, not you. Again, print out the email receipt and take it in to show them. Why should you have to pay for their mistakes? I'll keep my fingers crossed for you, but be firm with them and show them that you are not willing to 'accept' that you have to pay when they have messed up. Good Luck!!

[foxychick]

Am I right in thinking you are based down Aldinga way? I am not sure if you have already tried this, but have you spoken to your local MP?

 

I would suggest maybe calling to see the lady that has an office at Morphett Vale on the corner of South Road and is it Bains Road - Amanda Rishworth her name is. I had dealings with a lady there and she was most helpful. Sometimes they have great connections, and as you know with good old Ady - it is often about who you know.

 

I apologise for not remembering all the details - but why aren't Rich's work being more supportive and forceful on this issue - they want to keep him here, and I would have thought being a hospital they should be able to have some infulence.

[Anne B]

I would have thought that, given your occupations and qualifications, Australia would be really keen to get and keep people like you, as surely you will make a positive contribution to Australian society.

 

Unfortunately, in contrast to the image of Australia as a relaxed happy go lucky nation of easy-going people, it does seem to be incredibly bureaucratic.

 

I can't help with anything but I hope it gets sorted out. If not, would you get more of a welcome somewhere else, like New Zealand for example? Good Luck.

[Guest caoimhe]

I honestly know how you guys feel as the DIAC p****d out about earlier in the year and some days I felt like telling them ''ok you win, I'm off back home''......

At least you have the proof the info was sent we unfortunately had no proof of the advice they gave us on 5 separate occassions which was the wrong advice!!!!

You have come so far and spent too much money to let them get to you, honestly once that PR comes through you will feel such a relief. For the 1st 18 months of living here I never felt I belonged, it was only when we finally got PR that my feelings changed, no one can understand what its like being here on a temp visa unless they have done it so I honestly do feel for you both and really really hope it works out for you very soon. Hang in there I promise its worth it in the end:wubclub:

[Guest Team 'W']

I can totally relate to you hunny, we too have been kicked in the teeth time and time again, get no help, no one to go too , yes it pisses you rite off [sorry if this has offended anyone] ..

Were a year in and still no nearer to getting of the ground even tho the work is comming in left rite and centre ,no wonder the banks say you have to be in Australia before they will speak to you ,ye to tell you were to get off....

You have to constantly fight for everything here nothing comes easy,oh ye and getting told your to old to fill up chuffing yoghurt cartons [YES] too old ...well if that dont pee you rite of nuthing will...lol

Good job i dont get upset to easy other wise i would have shoved her head in the bloody blender ...

 

But at least hubbs is working but it wont help us in the long run when the visa runs out we WILL have to leave ozz ,thru no fault of our own !!

 

Yes it dus suck, but you go on believing and hoping that it will get better, to some it dus to others they are not so lucky , but i do hope your one of the lucky ones my darlin, i know you have been here two years so it CAN only get better ,like the others are saying deep breathes ,chin up and please let something positive come out of this ...

 

Take care ,

 

Elaine x

[Guest nicandchris]

Hi Julia i just want to say how sorry i am that your experiencing such awful things in your life when generally you seem very upbeat and positive in your responses to others and your posts (mine i know!). I can hear that despite loving Australia and most asepcts of it that your feeling really frustrated and down and this i dont believe can be helped by being pregnant and being a mum and wife and trying to keep it all together.

 

I hope that contacting your MP might help as i cant believe that Australia isnt helpful to at least your husband for his job as i cant imagine that its one that many can do over there.

 

I do hope that you get your visa sorted out asap so that you can relax.

 

nic

[Guest calamitycaz]

I really hope that you can get all this sorted out - I applied for my PR visa 4 years ago and did it all independantly, it was a long slog and I realised very quickly that the only was to make it a foolproof and successful experience was to document everything and keep the proof to back your case up. You will have both worked long and hard to get where you are, I can understand completely the feelings of exhaustion and "having had enough" and I haven't even arrived yet! Please don't give up - remember the reasons why you wanted to be in Australia and use that as motivation to be bloody minded with the visa people!!

Good luck I hope it all works out for you,

Caz xxx

[Riponian]

Julia

 

Don't know what to say but please look after yourself you have your family to look after and those little girls need their mummy in one piece. Hope you can get some help and it gets sorted out, please shout if you need anything we will help if we can.

 

Chin up and good luck I am sure it will all come good just stay focussed and positive but most of all relax and don't get too worked up.

 

Love

Michelle

[Guest Nick11]

We've been there..got the tee shirt ..and after a lot of mickey taking (5 years) ..failed 176 visa applications, rejected sponserships, last chance saloon 475 visas and finally 887 permanent visa.

It WILL be worth it.

HANG IN THERE

You are so close.

Wheres a karma button when you need one!!!!!!!

xxx

[Guest cazzie]

I am so sad and sorry to hear about your troubles. It really does make me angry that things have to be so difficult here whether it's about skills/qualifications/jobs/money/bureaucracy etc. I hope everything works out for you. Good luck with it all.

 

 

 

Suzer - loved your line about marriage!!