AussieRob

Ashes Jokes

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    I do feel guilty about this being a Pom in Australia, but i know i would get it with both barrels from certain collegues at work. So if you want some ammo with which to pay your Aussie friends out with then maybe we can post some jokes...

     

    What do you call an australian with a bottle of Champagne ? Waiter

     

    I see the Australian Cricket fans were in fancy dress this morning at the SCG, as plastic Chairs.

     

    What do you call a Australian Cricketer with 100 runs to his name ? A bowler.

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    Guest lastboyscout

    Q: What is the main function of the Australia coach?

     

    A: To transport the team from the hotel to the ground.

     

    Q: Who spends the most time on the crease of anyone in the Australian team?

     

    A: The woman who ironed the cricket whites.

     

    Q: Why don't Aussie fielders need pre-tour travel injections?

     

    A: Because they never catch anything.

     

    Q: What's the Aussie version of a hat trick?

     

    A: Three runs in three balls.

     

    Q: What do Aussie batsmen and drug addicts have in common?

     

    A: Both spend most of their time wondering where their next score will come from.

     

    Q: What is the most proficient form of footwork displayed by Australian batsmen?

     

    A: The walk back to the pavilion.

     

    Q: What did the spectator miss when he went to the toilet?

     

    A: The entire Australian innings.

     

    Q: What's the Australian version of LBW?

     

    A: Lost, Beaten, Walloped.

     

    Q: Why do Australians call their favourite drink XXXX?

     

    A: Because they can't spell beer.

     

    :biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh:

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