Guest teamV

A bit of a knock back

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    Guest teamV

    I wasn't sure if I should post this up or not ,but here goes,

     

    On Saturday we were at our local haven park and spotted a family there ,with one of them wearing a top with an Adelaide local club name on it ,so as its the thing thats on our minds 24/7 ,Vicky asked if they had been there on holiday ,but it turned out they had lived there for a few years ,both worked there and bought a house as well ,but had returned to england about 18 months ago,so as you do we asked the Why,this is what they told us,

     

    They had moved out about 4 years ago lock stock and barrel ,as most do ,spent the first few months staying in taperoo ,I think with freinds ,then bought a 4 bedroom house somewhere else and moved in (I can't remember were the house was, only that it began with a p ,sorry but this was a lot to take in ,in half an hour).

     

    The husband was a joiner and had a maintenance job at a school and his wife was a nurse and used to travel to peoples houses collecting bloods .they had 2 children and a 3rd was born while in Oz.

     

    Now the why's

     

    The said they had found that there was a lot of alcohol and drug abuse,,which they weren't expecting and they felt was the cause of a higher than normal amount of mental health issuse's.While out working as a nurse so found the ozzy's abusive and had a total dislike of the english and other new migrants.

     

    They also found it impossable to mix with the locals and said if you went to a beach 99% of people there would be expats, as the Ozzy's wouldn't go out it the sun and thought anyone who did was stupid.(which could be a good point)

    Anyway what they said was nothing would get them back to Oz.

     

    This has knocked us a bit ,as I think it would anyone as we have 2 young sons and the couple were also negative about the schools and the way their children had been treated .Sorry about this but I couldn't keep this in any longer and we need some positives to get us back on track ,I know its only 1 familys view but there's no smoke without fire,

     

    So please cheer us up :arghh:

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    There's no such thing as paradise if there was we would all be moving there. Every country has it problems and issues and drugs are everywhere that's a fact of life. It's the way you bring up your family that gives them the correct life values and this you hope keeps them away from the drugs and helps them make the correct decisions in life. As for Aussies not being approachable I'm not so sure. They give you more time of day then the average people and in my opinion are very friendly on the whole. Here's the thing though it's a two way streak and maybe the couple you met just did not fit in. As for being anti immigrants aren't we all to a certain extent if we are being honest. Most of us leaving the uk would list our poor immigration control as a reason in part for wanting to migrate to Aus, just some might not admit it. You get round this by in my opinion giving the banter back, Aussies tell it as it is and personally I like that. It's not paradise it has it's problems like everywhere but in my opinion is much better then the uk.

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    Guest Adelaide_bound

    Don't forget that most people are either black or white on things - shades of grey aren't always considered. Add to this the fact that they might feel slightly embarrassed with the coming back, that they might have 'failed' in some way, and therefore either consciously or sub-consciously are making it worse than it actually is/was.

     

    There are lots of little things that they said that you could pick apart bit by bit (eg - it was hard to mix with the locals - reason being they don't go to the beach. So....go do the things that they do do then - go and bug your neighbours, join the local knitting group, join the 'Aussies are us' appreciation society and so on...), but tbh I don't know if that's what you want, you probably know all this in your heart.

     

    I would also ask, where were they from in the UK, had they ever lived in a different part of the UK or overseas before, or was this the first foray outside a single home town? You could also say the wife's job in particular might have exposed them to more of the drugs/illness side that they report on - a) she probably visited more people than most so got to see far more people than most in that way b) healthy people tend not to have to have bloods taken, ill people do, and there is more chance of someone who has drug and drink issues, and/or is ill therefore having bloods taken and her coming into contact with them.

     

    I'm not there yet, so only trying to talk from a balanced argument point of view. You can only suck it and see - whats the worst that can happen? You find out that it is indeed far worse than this? At least you will know for yourself and will have given it a go - it is better to have lived one day as a tiger than a whole life as a sheep (says the Welshy lol). Life is short and is an adventure, would you rather wonder what if forever, or give it a go?

     

    And there is plenty of smoke without fire sometimes = my current situation with my boss being one of them (the things I have been accused of etc).

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    I wouldn't worry so much about it. The way things look on the forums recently there will be more expats than locals soon anyway lol ..(joke by the way)

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    Guest Becster19

    I cannot comment on the drugs/alcohol issues but having lived in Adelaide for a year previously I can completely say that not all Ozzies in Adelaide are English haters. I worked doing events for a mining company and my husband worked as a joiner and we can honestly say we have never met such helpful and lovely people as we did in Adelaide. People went out of their way to help us, helping us move, helping us sell our things when we left to go to Nz and even go as far as helping us look into different visa options. It is the people and how welcome we were made to feel that has made us want to move back. I never encountered any hostility. I would def take their opinions on board, it never hurts to hear another side of the story, but keep in mind its one persons experience and not the experience of everyone by any stretch if the imagination.

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    Guest shella_n

    Hi

     

    I have to say that we haven't encountered any of the problems you mentioned. I have heaps and heaps of Ozzie friends who are all lovely and if it hadn't had been for them we wod not have got through the hard times. They defo aren't beach lovers like us (1 of them is) but it's because they have different interests & hobbies whereas ours are diving, surfing etc.

     

    There are a lot of brits in the southern suburbs and maybe they lived there which is why they only meant other Brits at the beach.

     

    I've had NO experience of anyone being horrible because I'm British - all my Aussie mates love me for it.

     

    Don't let their comments stop you coming - everyones experience will be different depending on what life u had in uk and what u do when you get here. We LOVE it here and have no plans to go home. Do your research and work out if it's for youbut don't put roomy h weight on other peoples personal experiences.

     

    Good luck

     

    Muchelle

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    I can speak from our own experience of living in Adelaide for 5 years and then returning to the UK. We both worked in jobs where there were some friendly helpful people and other not so much - just like the UK. It isn't paradise but as everyone says, nowhere is paradise. We loved some things about living in Adelaide and hated others - just like the UK. We achieved everything we set out to do when we moved to Adelaide but after 5 years there we made the big decision to come back to the UK. We certainly don't feel like failures for coming back. We would have been failures if we hadn't gone in the first place. Don't let one person's experience put you off, everyone is different.

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    Guest mark&rachel

    There is alcohol and drug abuse here the same as everywhere else in the world. However, its not half as bad as UK. I can say that from a professional point of view. The Class A drugs are not as easy to get here.

    Alcohol is obviously legal so will always be abused by some. As many have said there its all about opinions. They may have been in an area where it was particularly common. Dont have second doubts from one couple.

    The reasons you want to leave UK (whatever they are) are probably still there and the reasons you think Adelaide is a better place is probably also still true.

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    I wasn't sure if I should post this up or not ,but here goes,

     

    1 Spent the first few months staying in Taperoo ,

     

    2 If you went to a beach 99% of people there would be expats, as the Ozzy's wouldn't go out it the sun and thought anyone who did was stupid.(which could be a good point)

    3 Anyway what they said was nothing would get them back to Oz.

     

     

    So please cheer us up :arghh:

     

    Glad you posted this but here is my view...

     

    1.Taperoo, Not the best of places to live in Adelaide. Most of it is community housing.

     

    2, No matter where you go in the world you will hear the English accent over the local accent its built in to your senses.

     

    3, What a shame.

     

    Remember there is always someone that does not like something and will put it down so they can make them selves feel good about there choices.

    You will not regret trying life over here.

    Rob and Mel

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    Guest mark&rachel

    As Rob and Mel said there are lots of expats over here. Its not a bad thing to be honest. There are plenty of Aussies too. But there are also plenty of Japanese, Chinese, South Africans, Dutch, Kiwis etc etc.

    Its a nice place so alot of people wana live here.

     

    Only my personal view however

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    Guest Squareman

    I've never been to Taperoo, but I certainly have not experienced ANY of those things, living in Glenelg and working on the outskirts of the city. I have not seen a single syringe lying about the place or any other drug-related stuff.

     

    As for the people, I have never met more friendly, social people in my life.

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    Look, it's a huge move and I reckon it's only natural to keep worrying whether it's going to be right for you and your family but I would be careful to keep an open mind.

     

    I think it's great that you have posted your concerns but don't be surprised if there are some replies that agree with the people you met...people have different ways of looking at things and an opinion is just that and I don't think it can be judged as right or wrong: it's all personal.

     

    I think a lot depends on where you live, what you do will colour what you see, how old your kids are,etc etc.

     

    My two kids have totally different experiences - one is a total nerd and has friends the same. They do not have much contact with drugs etc because that is not the world they inhabit. They've gone through primary to uni together and it's all goid. The second is very similar but was always into sport at primary school so has grown up with those kids. They tend to hang round the oval and drugs (Ecstasy, speed and, of course, marijuana) and alcohol are about. Doesn't mean they use either just that they have easy access. Dealers are evident but pretty much always have been but they don't impact on my life.

     

    Most of our friends are Australian, if I bother counting, and that's partly because of the kids, partly because we made an effort to integrate and held back from becoming too dependant on fellow migrants and partly because most people here are Australian so of course our friends would be lol!

     

    It's a shame it didn't work out for the people you met. They obviously gave it a good go but a half hour's conversation possibly didn't allow you to get a balanced view on their lives here- or maybe, not even the truth of it. Maybe they missed familiar surroundings or family or never quite fitted in, in their own minds?

     

    South Australia is fab but not everyone will love it here. And there's nothing wrong with that cos if everyone did love it, they probably woukdn't be trying to attract migrants!

     

    Relax and consider what you want for your family and whether sunny (ha!)SA fills that for you. Don't be swayed by too good OR too negative posts!

    Good luck,

    LC

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    I couldn't agree more with your comment, Adelaide_bound. You've said it the way I'd have done. I was going to write a long post about the good things about Adelaide (having lived there for 19 years), but you've saved me the trouble. Adelaide's great!!!!!! Don't be put off by the negative overview, teamV. One thing bothers me, though: If that family hated it so much, why was one of the family wearing the Adelaide club T-shirt??? I'd have thought they'd have binned it good and proper, if it represented such negative values!?

     

    Don't forget that most people are either black or white on things - shades of grey aren't always considered. Add to this the fact that they might feel slightly embarrassed with the coming back, that they might have 'failed' in some way, and therefore either consciously or sub-consciously are making it worse than it actually is/was.

     

    There are lots of little things that they said that you could pick apart bit by bit (eg - it was hard to mix with the locals - reason being they don't go to the beach. So....go do the things that they do do then - go and bug your neighbours, join the local knitting group, join the 'Aussies are us' appreciation society and so on...), but tbh I don't know if that's what you want, you probably know all this in your heart.

     

    I would also ask, where were they from in the UK, had they ever lived in a different part of the UK or overseas before, or was this the first foray outside a single home town? You could also say the wife's job in particular might have exposed them to more of the drugs/illness side that they report on - a) she probably visited more people than most so got to see far more people than most in that way b) healthy people tend not to have to have bloods taken, ill people do, and there is more chance of someone who has drug and drink issues, and/or is ill therefore having bloods taken and her coming into contact with them.

     

    I'm not there yet, so only trying to talk from a balanced argument point of view. You can only suck it and see - whats the worst that can happen? You find out that it is indeed far worse than this? At least you will know for yourself and will have given it a go - it is better to have lived one day as a tiger than a whole life as a sheep (says the Welshy lol). Life is short and is an adventure, would you rather wonder what if forever, or give it a go?

     

    And there is plenty of smoke without fire sometimes = my current situation with my boss being one of them (the things I have been accused of etc).

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    Here's my humble opinion.

     

    1 : Drug Use, I grew up in a not so good part of West Bromwich and I haven't heard drugs talked about so openly as it is here. Up until a few years ago you were actually allowed to grow weed for personal use in your house, so there is a different attitude towards it. Apart from people talking about it a little more openly I haven't actually seen anyone taking drugs. The worst I've seen in 6 years is a needle on christies beach. it was shocking but it is an area with a bit of a reputation so you have to be more aware.

     

    2 : Alcohol use, I think it's pretty similar to the UK, I can't really tell the difference. Probably the worst of heard of was a traffic report concerning a drunk on grand junction road. In fairness though I saw something similar in Wolverhampton.

     

    3 : Mental Health, I think things are much different here, there are nutters everywhere (don't know the correct PC term). There's a 30+ year old guy who we call superman at Collonades, we saw him once in his superman costume, pirate hat and riding a hobby horse. It's really quite sad. His mother is a 60 year old tattoo'd women who i had heard walked through there in a grass skirt with no undies. There are others too. In fairness though, whilst I've seen these with way more regularity than in the UK, you don't see gangs of hoodies or kids trying to look menacing for the sake of it. In other words as weird as it is, it's still nicer to be here than the uk.

     

    4 : Getting on with the locals is hard, they have lived and worked somewhere for years and all have friends, they may not be actively looking out for more friends. Over time though with some effort it will happen. I don't think there is anything wrong with befriending expats at first, as we were all in the same boat once, where we just want to create our own circle of friends. Over time though, through work or social events it will happen and you'll have a mixture of friends. I went to Thailand last year with what I thought were Aussie friends, and it turns out from 12 people 7 were Australian, 3 were English, 1 was Scottish, and 1 was a kiwi. I had just never asked anyone where they were originally from before, so even my Aussie friends weren't all Aussie.

     

    Sometimes though it's just a perspective on how you look at things. I just took my partner to the UK for the first time, and we loved it, but if we focused on the bad parts of life in the UK, like just how rude many retail staff are, or the fact you drive for miles, as such the roads are always clogged, you have roadworks for fun everywhere, the airports are an crammed and dirty, people in general are just so abrupt and rude (sometimes just had to push people out of my way), pubs had ran out of beer, we had property stolen from the hotel room, the police gave us the run around as no-one claimed it was their responsibility and all the kids talk with some weird accent that didn't even sound English. And to top it off, the UK was voted the recently as the worst place to live in europe, even behind Poland according to our local paper. Do i really think the UK is that bad, No, but looking at the bad points doesn't paint a rosy picture.

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    Guest matt gibbons

    Myself and wife and our 2 boys moved here from Buckinghamshire over 2 years ago, we live in a place called Seaford rise which is great, we have found the locals to be very friendly,some of our good friends we have made our ozzy.

    Its only human nature to listen to what other people say,but you need to make your own choice,its not for everyone but we love it.

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    Guest loopylisa

    Alot of really good comments but I guess i'd like to share my experiences. As a child I was bullied abit when I got here for being english and so didnt feel particularly welcome and also found the quality of the high school in particular to not be particularly good(not that it was any different in the UK). But at the end of the day you have the control to change things like that when you get here even if it does happen, like people have said you can be proactive and make new friends if you really wish- there are plenty of aussies out here, you can move your childs school- not EVERY single school in Adelaide is going to be bad. And now I am here as an adult and have matured I can reflect upon some of the bad experiences I had as a child and see them for isolated incidents these bad experiences do not reflect Adelaide and its people as a whole they are just reflective of life and its the way you move on from this which counts. As others have sad Adelaide is great and if you are determined you can make of it what you will.

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    as said before no where is perfect and it can be what you make it. We have found the ozzies friendly and great and basically all our friends we spend most time with here are ozzies. Ozzies opinions, that i have spoken to they accept anyone who gives it a good go, who dont arrive expecting oz to change and they have a dislike of anyone who comes here and moans about how things are different. In over 3 years working and living with more nationalities than i have ever worked with before (Greeks, Italians, Chinese, Indonesian, Mexican, french, Turkish, African, etc etc etc) it is embarrasing to say that the only people with attitudes have been POMS.

     

    I will say though in 3 years here i have actually seen more drug use than i ever did in the uk (which can honestly say was never as never mixed in that type of environment) but what was more of a worry was in the 3 occasions i have witnessed here was made worse by the fact the people were either parked in a public car park at a fast food establishment in the CBD with silver foil and lighter not to keep warm!, driving and stopped at traffic lights on Port wakefield Road with a plastic bottle which was not set up for drinking! or even driving on the southern expressway with a car of 5 teenagers passing round what was obviously a joint! Here it seems more open and in your face and talked about alot more from what i have seen and heard. As long as it does not affect me or my family i do not care and this not the place to express what i think of drug use and the users.

     

    Would not say there is a worse drink problem here than in the uk, although the amount who get done for drink driving shows the intelligence of some but thats another story!

     

    All in all, yes they may have expressed why they returned and all the reasons seemed bad but then again i have never heard of anyone returning and saying how great things were.

     

    Just my views but obviously not everyones!

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    Guest Guest5035

    Here's my 2 bucks worth, I am at the mo in the uk, second time in a year, last time 3 weeks, this time 2 weeks, my thoughts,if I could take the weather,lifestyle and wages back to the uk I would move back, but that's a no goer. I have noticed both times that everywhere seems dull, grey and dare I say run down, even the people!! Compared to Adelaide, things are cheaper but also expensive!! The past 5 days it's been grey skies and drizzle,albeit warmish, that does not help either. What I do miss is Europe being so close, it took me 20 hours to get to Rome for the cruise, but we loved the med ports of call.

     

    Stevo

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    Guest Nick11

    Unfortunately there is a lot of people over here who suffer from mental health issues....and it isnt noticeable as you go about your daily life. There is a huge network of support here for this...which is a good thing if you think about...active support for an illness that can destroy your mind. You all probably work alongside a colleague who has it. The lady you was talking to ..was probably on the front line of it...so her experiences and observations of mental health in sa are probably spot on. The more I work here....the more I realise it.

    The culture of drink driving here and south australians attitudes towards it...is pretty disgusting. They really cant see the harm in it!!!!

    As for being accepted by ozzies.....absolutely. No problems at all.

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    Guest teamV

    Well i'm not going to reply to each answer as it looks about 50/50 on what they said ,We were never thinking of not going out to Adelaide ,although we have never been and only know what we know through asking others, being on here and doing research on line ect.We had planned a long holiday this year going to stay in a few different citys with the longest time being in Adelaide but our visa only took 8 months from phoning the agent to being in our passports ,so for varies reasons we don't want to fly out till late may ,as we don't want to vallidate the visa till then.So thats Knackerd that up .

     

    Our plan was allway's to look at this as a 5 year working holiday and if it all pans out then stay longer ,I think most people will soon know whether moving to Australia is for them or not ,I would like to think it will suit us and we will be there for a long time ,but if I find Adelaide isn't for me ,we will just up sticks and try somewhere else in Oz .Ive worked All over the uk before and find I soon fit in, Vicky is a bit more nervous about the move ,as she is very close to her famliy and has been working with me for the last 8 years and isn't sure were she will fit in to the jobs market.Our oldest son Glenn is 5 in march has just started school after 4 years in nursery,having to meet new kids every day,but hes the one i'm most worried about,as hes so keen on school ,seems very bright ,which nice is a surprize as i'm not :0) and seems to be learning alot very quickly and we are just hoping all the upheaval won't cause him to much upset and that at school he want be just going over the same stuff he's already done here .

    Our yongest Alex is only 10 months and dosnt know his arse from his elbow yet ,so should soon settle in .

     

    So apart from the coment about throwing the sweat shirt in the bin ,which I found fairly pointless ,as it was one of the children wearing it and it had been passed down to them ,Also with moving the full lenth of the world, buying 3 and selling 2 houses, I think money was a bit tight ,great and honest thread.

     

    We are going to meet them again as we found we had freinds in comon ,so next time we should have more time to talk ,we also talked about buying a house ,shipping and work ,as I said the time we spent with them was only half an hour but their over all experance of Adelaide was negative and a very expensive and draining time .although they did seem a happy and close famliy,

     

    Kev.

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    With regard to the schooling, I am trying to see the positives in my son doing 18 months of reception all up. He'll do a full year here in the UK then we'll move to Adelaide and he'll most likely do 2 terms of reception there also. We are planning to put him in with his peers and he'll therefore be one of the oldest in his year if we do it this way.

     

    Yes he may have already covered some of the stuff in the UK, but hopefully it will be different enough that he won't mind. Also, boys usually tend to struggle more than girls in the early years of schooling so for us its not a worry if he does some stuff over again or uses those 2 terms to find his feet in the school and settle in properly before going up to year 1 the following school year. It seems to make more sense to us to allow for all those things and give him every possible advantage we can in his early schooling once in Adelaide. We'd rather do it this way and not fret over his repeating things (which in my understanding its similar but different enough to keep them interested at such a young age), just go with the flow, embrace the Aussie schooling system and count those extra 2 terms of reception as a bonus. Many SA kids do 6 terms of reception anyways due to the current intake set up, those turning 5 and starting in terms 3 or 4 then do another year at present. Its the norm but due to change in 2014 when there is one cut off point for the year and if your child birthday falls after this they won't start till the following year then.

     

    The thinking behind it for us is to hopefully give our son a really good grounding, the advantage of being one of the oldest in his year and we won't feel we are putting pressure on him to play catch up or throwing him in at the deep end and having him really struggle.

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    Guest Jane & Tony

    Hi

    My OH's Mum,Dad, Sister and hubby and two young children went to Adelaide 20 years ago. Mum and Dad are in their 70's now and they enjoy outdoor bowls in the sunshine. Sis has a gorgeous house and the grown up boys have had a great education. The youngest (23) works for an oil company, is married, has had his own 4 bed house built and is earning mega bucks.

     

    Hubby and me went to validate our visa 2 years ago. Oh is into clay shooting so our motel owner who has become a good mate (aussie) found a shooting club in Malalla, which is about 40k north of Adl. We phoned the club and they said 'it is our Cristmas shoot tomorrow, come along to that'. Well we went and they invited us for the buffet (free) Tony was lent a £10000 Browning shot gun, plus others and we have NEVER been as welcomed anywhere in the UK like that. They welcomed us with open arms and we had a great day.

     

    I think you choose your own path in life and if you choose to take drugs and abuse alcohol, that's up to you. I'm sure there are rough areas in Adelaide just like the UK. You need to find that out before you settle in an area.

     

    I have also found that a lot of people come home because they miss friends and family too much. That seems to be the biggie.

     

    Like someone said to me not long ago (Heaps Good)...........

     

    Follow your dreams.

     

    Good Luck.xxxxxxxxxxx

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