Tamara (Homes Down Under)

Sense of adult humour required !!!

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    There are so many funny e mails and links that get sent out but this is one of the funniest i have seen for ages.

     

    It's an actual ad on Amazon in the UK for Veet hair removal cream for men...say no more!

    Take a quick look and then scroll down to the product rating comments!!!!

     

    http://www.amazon.co.uk/Veet-Hair-Removal-Creme-200ml/dp/B000KKNQBK/ref=cm_rdp_product

     

     

     

     

     

    Tamara :smile:

    Edited by Tamara (Homes Down Under)

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    Love it Tamara!- a really good laugh... one of the reviewers hits the nail on the head

     

    "You guys have made my day. These reviews are absolutely hilarious. I sat in the corner of a packed commuter train, reading them on my iphone and laughing until i was crying. I was doubled up clutching my stomach, tears rolling down my cheeks and just laughing out loud. Well done, they should be made into a book they are so so funny.

     

    This product removes hair brilliantly i give it 5 stars, the reviews remove the blues also"

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    Guest ali

    Veet, sometimes you love it and sometimes (when things go wrong) you just can't stop cursing them:mad::biglaugh:

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    Guest ladyarkles

    Absolutely BRILLIANT!!!

     

    I hope Amazon don't take this off their site.

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    That's sooo funny - really made my day, thank you. Funnily enough I was listening to some awful local radio programme last night and they were talking about "manscaping" - one of the comments that stuck in my mind was "you trim the foliage and it makes the trunk of the tree look bigger!" Perhaps we need a separate thread for the PIA men - Do you, or Don't you?!!!

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    Guest ladyarkles

    Oh, please, please don't encourage this lot to get their carp and tackle out.

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    Guest Guest75
    That's sooo funny - really made my day, thank you. Funnily enough I was listening to some awful local radio programme last night and they were talking about "manscaping" - one of the comments that stuck in my mind was "you trim the foliage and it makes the trunk of the tree look bigger!" Perhaps we need a separate thread for the PIA men - Do you, or Don't you?!!!

     

    And best to give your measurements in Millimeters as it makes things seem bigger than inches.:swoon:

     

    A bit of "pruning" goes on - keeps things cooler .:cute:

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    Guest Guest75
    There are so many funny e mails and links that get sent out but this is one of the funniest i have seen for ages.

     

    It's an actual ad on Amazon in the UK for Veet har removal creme for men...say no more!

    Take a quick look and then scroll down to the product rating comments!!!!

     

    http://www.amazon.co.uk/Veet-Hair-Removal-Creme-200ml/dp/B000KKNQBK/ref=cm_rdp_product

     

     

     

     

     

    Tamara :smile:

     

     

    But why were you looking Tamara??:biglaugh::biglaugh:

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    Love it, laughing so much my tummy hurts. Mason just said he hasn't seen me laugh so much.

     

    Lisa

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    OMG this should have had a warning with it. i nearly wet myself laughing.

    I have sentthis to loads of people. thanks so much this is priceless.

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    So glad I logged on - I haven't stopped laughing since I read it. My tummy hurts and I wish I hadn't had 2 large coffees!:embarressed:

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    Guest guest8040

    It's been on a good while as I saw it earlier this year and they haven't removed it, if gets people going to their site I don't think they will! it's the best tonic/pick me up and I feel like there is karma in this world for all the flaming hair us ladies have to remove!

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    Guest BrianS
    It's been on a good while as I saw it earlier this year and they haven't removed it, if gets people going to their site I don't think they will! it's the best tonic/pick me up and I feel like there is karma in this world for all the flaming hair us ladies have to remove!

     

    Same as, seen it a while ago, the first few were good and now it seems every man and his dog (which could be disturbing ) are joining in.

     

    Bring back 27bslash6.com

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    Here's another one for the ladies ...... (especially any crafter out there)

     

    I was due for an appointment with the gynaecologist later in the week. Early one morning, I received a call from the doctor's secretary to tell me there was a

    cancellation and the 9:30 am appointment was available.

     

    I took it. I had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already around 8:45 am. The trip to his clinic took about 35 minutes, so I didn't have any time to spare. As most women do, I like to take a little extra effort over hygiene when making such visits, but this time I was not going to be able to make the full effort.

     

    So, I rushed upstairs, threw off my pyjamas, wet the flannel that was sitting next to the sink, and gave myself a quick wash in "that area" to make sure I was at least presentable. I threw the flannel in the clothes basket, donned some clothes, hopped in the car and raced to my appointment.

     

     

    I was in the waiting room for only a few minutes when I was called in.

     

    Knowing the procedure, as I'm sure you do, I hopped up on the table, looked over at the other side of the room and pretended that I was in Paris or some

    other such glamorous place a million miles away. I was a little surprised when the doctor said, "My, we have made an extra effort this morning, haven't we?"

     

     

    I didn't respond. After the appointment, I heaved a sigh of relief and went home. The rest of the day was normal... some shopping, cleaning, cooking,

    etc. After school when my six year old daughter was playing, she called out from the bathroom, "Mummy, where's my flannel?"

     

    I told her to get another one from the cupboard. She replied, "No!!!"

     

    Now wait for it......., this is too funny not to be true!!!

     

     

    She yelled, "I need the one that was

    here by the sink, it had all my

    glitter and sparkles saved inside it."

     

    :biglaugh:

     


     

     







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    Luiggi walks to work 20 blocks everyday and passes a shoe store twice everyday.

     

    Each day he stops and looks in the window to admire the Armani leather shoes.

     

    He wants those shoes so much...it's all he can think about.

     

    After about 2 months he saves the price of the shoes, $300, and purchases them.

     

    Every Friday night the Italian community holds a dance in the church basement.

     

    Luiggi seizes this opportunity to wear

    his new Armani leather shoes for the first time.

    He asks Sophia to dance and as they dance he asks her, 'Sophia, did you wear red panties tonight?'

     

    Startled, Sophia replies,

     

    'Yes, Luiggi , I did wear red panties tonight,

     

     

    But how do you know?'

     

    Luiggi answers,

     

    'I see the reflection in my new $300 Armani leather shoes.

    How, do you like them?'

     

     

    Next he asks Rosa to dance, and after a few minutes he asks,

    ' Rosa , did you wear white pantiestonight?'

     

    Rosa answers,

     

    'Yes, Luiggi , I did,

     

     

    But how do you know that?'

     

    He replies,

     

    'I see the reflection in my new $300 Armani leather shoes.. .

    How, do you like them?'

     

     

    Now as the evening is almost over and the last song is being played,

    Luiggi asks Carmela to dance.

     

     

    Midway through the dance his face

    turns red...

     

    He states, 'Carmela, be stilla my heart,

     

    Please, please tell me you wear no panties tonight,

     

    Please, please, tella me this true!'

     

    Carmela smiles coyly and answers,

     

    'Yes Luiggi , I wear no panties tonight...'

     

    Luiggi gasps,

     

    'Thanka God ...

     

    I thought I had a CRACK in my

    $300 Armani leather shoes..!!!!'.

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    Enjoy these but remember someone wrote them believing in what they are saying……..

     

     

    Proof reading is definitely a dying art ...

    wouldn't you say after reading this

    Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this.. It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!!! They put in a correction the next day.

     

    Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says

    Really? You think?

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------

     

     

    Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over

    What a guy!

    ---------------------------------------------------------------

     

    Miners Refuse to Work after Death

    No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-so's!

    ------------------------------------------------------

     

    Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

    See if that works any better than a fair trial!

    ----------------------------------------------------------

     

    War Dims Hope for Peace

    I can see where it might have that effect!

    ----------------------------------------------------------------

     

    If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last A while

    Really?!

    -----------------------------------------------------------------------

     

    Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures

    Who would have thought!

    ----------------------------------------------------------------

     

    Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; PoliceSuspect Homicide

    They may be on to something!

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

     

    Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges

    You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?

    ----------------------------------------------------------

     

     

    New Study of Obesity Looks for LargerTest Group

    Weren't they fat enough?!

    -----------------------------------------------

     

    Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft

    That's what he gets for eating those beans!

    ---------------- ---------------------------------

     

    Kids Make Nutritious Snacks

    Do they taste like chicken?

    ****************************************

     

    Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half

    Chainsaw Massacre all over again!

    ***************************************************

     

    Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

    Boy, are they tall!

    *******************************************

     

    And the winner is....

    Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

     

    Did I read that right?

    ***************************************************

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    The Tax Man

    At the end of the tax year, the Inland Revenue office sent an inspector to audit the books of a local hospital.

     

    While the inspector was checking the books he turned to the Accountant of the Hospital and said, "I notice you buy a lot of bandages. What do you do with the end of the roll when there's too little left to be of any use?"

     

    "Good question," noted the Accountant. "We save them up and send them back to the bandage company and every now and then they send us a free box of bandages."

     

    "Oh," replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual question had a practical answer.

     

    But on he went, in his obnoxious way. "What about all these plaster purchases? What do you do with what's left over after setting a cast on a patient?"

     

    "Ah, yes," replied the Hospital Accountant, realizing that the inspector was trying to trap him with an unanswerable question. "We save it and send it back to the manufacturer, and every now and then they send us a free package of plaster."

     

    "I see," replied the auditor, thinking hard about how he could fluster the know-it-all Accountant.

     

    "Well," he went on, "What do you do with all the leftover foreskins from the circumcisions you perform?"

     

    "Here, too, we do not waste," answered the Accountant. "What we do is save all the little foreskins and send them to the Inland Revenue Office, and about once a year they send us a complete prick

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    A dad buys a lie detector robot that slaps people when they lie. He decides to test it at dinner.

    "Son, where were you today?"

    The son says "At school, Dad."

    The robot slaps the son.

    "OK, I watched a DVD at my friend's house!" the son says.

    "What DVD?" asks the father.

    "Toy Story." The robot slaps the son again.

    "OK, it was a porno movie" cries the son.

    "What!? When I was your age I didn't know what porn was" says the dad.

    The robot slaps the dad.

    Mum laughs: "HaHaHa! He's certainly your son.."

    The robot slaps the mum.

    Awkward silence...

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    My OH just came home from work with this one............

     

    Jen, a manager for a hardware chain had the task of hiring someone to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of resumes she found 4 qualified people. She decided to call the four in and ask them only one question.

    Their answer would determine which of them would get the job.

     

    The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table Jen asked................"What is the fastest thing you know of?"

     

    The first person replied "A thought...it just pops into your head. There is no warning.

     

    Then she asked the second person...

    "Hmmm...let me see, 'A Blink'...it comes and goes and you dont know that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of".

     

    "Excellent!" said Jen..."The blink of an eye, that's a very popular cliche for speed".

     

    She then turned to the third person who was contemplating their reply..."Well, out at my dad's property, you step out of the house, and on the wall there's a light switch. When you flip that switch, way out accross the pasture the light in the barn comes on in less than an instant....YEP...turning on a light"

     

    Jen was very impressed by the third answer and she thought that she had found the right person. "It's hard to beat the speed of light" she said.

     

    Turning to the last person...(name changed to Stevo to protect real identity!:biglaugh:) ..she posed the same question.

    Stevo replied "After hearing the previous three answers it's obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHOEA"

     

    "What!" said Jen stunned by the response.

     

    ""Sure" said Stevo. "You see the other day i wasn't feeling so good and I ran for the bathroom................but before I could THINK, BLINK or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already sh@t myself!!!!!!!!!!!!:biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh:

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