Guest cazzie

4 days to go....how will I cope without my kids?

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    Guest cazzie

    Oh my God! Four days to go until we fly to Adelaide and it still seems so unreal. I still have soooo much to do, especially paperwork, tying admin stuff up, phone calls and visits to people and could I sleep last night? - no! I am shattered but have to drive to Basildon to see some old friends today and loads to do before that. I am definitely on a rollercoaster of emotions right now and my family are finding it very hard - they barely mention the fact that I am leaving. I have just become a grandmother this week too for the first time and I'm besotted with my gorgeous grandson. My daughter(Esther, who is in remission from cancer)has been away on holiday for three weeks and is only back on the day I leave, so getting together with her for a couple of hours before I go will be so emotional. Has anyone else left their children behind and if so, how did you cope? My four children are aged 32, 29, 20 and 18 and all independent but remain very close to their mum. While they are pleased for me as they know that I am very happy with Bill and looking forward to the challenge of Adelaide, they are all devastated really and as we are a very close family, I think they fear that we will fall apart as a family and that things won't be the same. I will be keeping in touch via every route I can think of and very often too. Hopefully, they will visit me and there will be acceptance of the situation and the realisation that the bond and relationship will remain strong and intact. Any advice/information on this situation will be much appreciated, thank you.

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    just want to say cassie you story is soooo sad, and i wish you all the luck in the world.

    maybe they will all end up moving over with you and bill you never know!!!!!

    good luck sweetie xxx

     

    suexxx

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    Cazzie

     

    I am really feeling for you...despite having never dealt with your particular impending departure and its emotions. I can only imagine how I would feel having been through saying goodbye to aging relatives back in December last year. I think I would find it even harder to say farewell to my daughters and any future grandchildren...I don't know what to say other than good luck for the next few days and your travels to Adelaide. We will all be thinking of you and wishing you well.

    Thank goodness for technology and web cams! We see more (ok so its only in a virtual sense if you know what I mean) of my in laws now we're here (2 x a week) than we did in the UK. And although nothing beats a hug and kiss it is the best we can manage for now until they visit next year.

     

    Good luck and see you on the other side sometime perhaps...

    Dette :wubclub:

    x

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    Guest Martin and Val

    Hi Cazzie and Bill,

    Firstly congratulations on the birth of your Grandson you must be so proud.

    We wish you all the very best for your future and hope to meet with you down under. We can't really answer your questions but sometime soon we will be in the same position, so we may well be asking you for advise and help.

    Between us we have 3 sons aged 31, 28 & 19 and an 8 year old grandson. Our eldest lives with his son in Norway and therefore we hardly ever see them, 2 1/2 years ago to be exact, the youngest once in a blue moon but the middle one very regularly and he is very close to Val. This will be Val's biggest hurdle and very emotional when the time finally comes.

    We do hope that he will at least follow us and have already asked our agent to look at it. Unfortunately at the moment he and his girlfriend don't have the required points but we hope once she has finished her qualifications in child care that they may well be able to come.

    It sounds like you both deserve the very best, so good luck and please keep us updated.

    Martin (and Val)

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    There's no getting away from the fact that the goodbyes are the hardest thing about leaving. You go through months and months of turmoil waiting for that bit of paper in your passport and then when it finally comes and the travel arrangements are made, you suddenly realise you have to say goodbye to everyone in your life that you love and care about. It will be very hard Cazzie, but I hope you find the strength to get through it and make the trip here to Adelaide. Keep trying to think of the reasons you wanted to come here in the first place as that will help your resolve. And try and make plans for the future, will the children be able to come out and see you? If not, reassure them that you will be back for a holiday in a few years time. Don't treat it as though you will never see them again because you almost certainly will. And there's always skype and phone calls and emails.

     

    Stay strong and best wishes.

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    Guest swampo

    Hi Cazzi,

     

    All of the thigs you have said and are undergoing are the same for us. We are also leaving our combined four children behind aged 32, 29,29 & 20, so very similar. All are very supportive and say they will come and visit etc. but it is still a huge wrench, although like you, we want to make this journey.

     

    So, unfortunately can't offer any advice, just empathy. But is is good to know that there are others in similar positions as us. We arrive on 11th October so perhaps we could meet up when we arrive and give each other moral support? I will pm you with our 'oz' phone number.

    Mall & Kev

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    Guest The Wise Family

    Hi Cazzi

     

    Just wanted to wish you good luck and a safe journey. Hope everything works out for you.

     

    Gina x

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    Guest cazzie

    Wow! Thank you so much all of you for your lovely, supportive posts. I guess that it is the hardest goodbye of all - to our children. I love mine like absolutely crazy, they have all grown up to be well mannered, hard working, confident adults and I'm so proud of all of them. Yes, they will be able to visit hopefully and so will my lovely mum. I have already said that we will be back next July for my grandson's christening, so that lifeline does help.

    I am dreading Saturday but glad that none of my family are prepared to take us to the airport as I couldn't bear it. Once I board the plane, I'm sure my excitement for the adventure will take over and then all I can do is keep in touch every which way. Thanks again everybody - you have been a fantastic support over these few months. I will post again once I'm over there and let you know how we are settling in. Bye for now, Cazzie x

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    Guest LOOBYLOO

    Can't imagine what you're going through. Our kids are luckily coming with us (7,12,17). At first 17 yr old didn't want to come but we went through with the process anyway and he is now excited about his new life in Oz (Oh said not to make an issue of it and he would come round - thankfully he was right). Hoping to move out in November but I am dreading the goodbyes (get quite tearful thinking about it!!). Best wishes to you and your family.

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    There's no getting away from the fact that the goodbyes are the hardest thing about leaving. You go through months and months of turmoil waiting for that bit of paper in your passport and then when it finally comes and the travel arrangements are made, you suddenly realise you have to say goodbye to everyone in your life that you love and care about. It will be very hard Cazzie, but I hope you find the strength to get through it and make the trip here to Adelaide. Keep trying to think of the reasons you wanted to come here in the first place as that will help your resolve. And try and make plans for the future, will the children be able to come out and see you? If not, reassure them that you will be back for a holiday in a few years time. Don't treat it as though you will never see them again because you almost certainly will. And there's always skype and phone calls and emails.

     

    Stay strong and best wishes.

     

     

    Can't really add anything more to Liz's well written post except to say Good Luck. :jiggy:

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