The rules of a Man

[Guest Roo1]

Ahh, now it all makes sense, thank you so much to the brillant man who wrote this :notworthy:Us women are not worthy of such insight!!

 

Judi x

 

 

 

 

The Man Rules­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

 

Finally, the guys' side of the story.

( I must admit, it's pretty good.)

We always hear the rules

From the female side.

 

Now here are the rules from the male side.

 

These are our rules!

Please note.. these are all numbered '1 '

ON PURPOSE!

 

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

 

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.

You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.

We need it up, you need it down.

You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

 

1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon

or the changing of the tides.

Let it be.

 

1. Crying is blackmail.

 

1. Ask for what you want.

Let us be clear on this one:

Subtle hints do not work!

Strong hints do not work!

Obvious hints do not work!

Just say it!

 

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

 

1. Come to us with a problemonly if you want help solving it. That's what we do.

Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

 

 

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

 

 

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.

Don't ask us.

 

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

 

1. You can either ask us to do something

Or tell us how you want it done.

Not both.

If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

 

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

 

1. Christopher Columbus did NOTneed directions and neither do we.

 

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.

Peach, for example, is a fruit, not Acolor. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

 

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.

We do that

 

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong.

We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

 

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

 

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

 

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or

 

motor sports

 

 

1. You have enough clothes.

 

1. You have too many shoes.

 

1. I am in shape.Round IS a shape!

 

1. Thank you for reading this.

Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

 

But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

 

Pass this to as many men as you can -

to give them a laugh.

 

Pass this to as many women as you can -

 

to give them a bigger laugh.

[Guest sarahsmartiepants]

Yes Roo, it really does make sence now.......I am just shocked that one had the insight to write something soooooooooo long!!!

[Guest Hansonhouse]

Roo, that's excellent, we both loved this, especially the question re: mauve, Rick didn't even know how to pronouce it, let alone have a clue as to what colour it might be.....

Thanks for lightening the miserable wet British Friday evening...

Roz