Guest sadie

Regret the move?

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    Guest sadie

    :unsure:

    Hi there,

    Does anyone else regret making this life changing move? and begin to realise the grass certainly is not any greener (dry and arid) and feel as though they have ended up in "The Land Time Forgot" having found you miss real friends and family sooo much, and only to realise you may be stuck here forever?? due to age and finances??

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    I don't regret the move, but it has been and still is frustrating at times. It takes 'heaps' of patience and perseverance. Have you been here long?

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    Guest sadie

    Hi,

     

    Thanks for the replies, been here about four years, and still not settled!

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    Guest Rob and Clare

    I can't say I regret the move, but I'm not in the "Loving it Camp" either...

     

    We've been here 4 years too in July, and I find there are somethings infintely better here, there are an awful lot of things worse too. So the grass is defintely not greener, but just different. I miss friends I've known for 20 years, we all grew up together, and my parents of course, but I also have to say thanks to this website we've made some terrific friends, and maybe because we're all in the same boat we've become good friends very quickly, I can only hope we all stay in Adelaide long enough to become older great friends.

     

    I can though see why people become ping pong poms, you miss things from england and go back, then miss Australia even more and come back again.

     

    I wish I knew the secret as to what makes some people settle easier than others, better research ? lower expectations ? a more general openess to their surroundings ? or a tie to familiy and friends that was never tested before ? if there was an easy answer I wished I knew it so i could save people a fortune and make one personally.

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    Guest graandjac

    ;)Not sure where you live but if you want some green you could come and cut my lawn as is growing at the rate of 4in a week at the moment;)

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    Guest graandjac
    I can't say I regret the move, but I'm not in the "Loving it Camp" either...

     

    We've been here 4 years too in July, and I find there are somethings infintely better here, there are an awful lot of things worse too. So the grass is defintely not greener, but just different. I miss friends I've known for 20 years, we all grew up together, and my parents of course, but I also have to say thanks to this website we've made some terrific friends, and maybe because we're all in the same boat we've become good friends very quickly, I can only hope we all stay in Adelaide long enough to become older great friends.

     

    I can though see why people become ping pong poms, you miss things from england and go back, then miss Australia even more and come back again.

     

    I wish I knew the secret as to what makes some people settle easier than others, better research ? lower expectations ? a more general openess to their surroundings ? or a tie to familiy and friends that was never tested before ? if there was an easy answer I wished I knew it so i could save people a fortune and make one personally.

     

     

    Worded perfectly i think you either settle or it takes time .....its just down to individual personalties...........but as a whole for us the grass is a little greener;)

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    Guest Martin and Val

    Hi Sadie,

    Welcome to PIA and I hope things do work out for you, good luck and don't give up if you have the choice. As for grass greener no just different but we only left England last Oct and it was positively brown over there at that time and it won't get any better!

    I think Rob and Clare have put it across perfectly. It's not an easy move and it's hard work when you get here.

    For us we had a really good life in England and this move was to give us a better work life balance and a new adventure. Although one of us is currently only in a temporary role we do believe we have achieved what we set out to. We are happy and have made some real true friends.

    Martin

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    Me and my daughter have settled in quicker than expected, only been here since Feb 09. My wife and son have not been able to settle, we all decided before we came that if anyone in the family could not settle after a year, we would go back to the UK. The way things are looking at the moment, we will be going back to the UK next year, but I will make sure I get a summer out of it first.

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    Guest kangomik

    What are they not settled with?

     

    What do people find tough?

     

    Open question, not meant to offend.

     

    What did you move to aus for/ expect aus to change?

     

    Cheers

    Mik

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    Dont get me wrong, they both like Adelaide, they think its lovely. They are missing family and friends too much, and to them been near to family and friends means more than a nice place to live.

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    Guest jorose

    At the moment I am going through the missing people stage & feeling incredibly lonely stage. However, the thought of going back to where I came from is not enough to entice me back, and personally speaking I am only in the very early stages of having arrived to a new country so I feel it is perfectly normal to feel this way. I can cope with lonely but I can't cope with the bitterness I had for the UK when I left.

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    Guest sadie
    Dont get me wrong, they both like Adelaide, they think its lovely. They are missing family and friends too much, and to them been near to family and friends means more than a nice place to live.

     

     

    My thoughts exactly, sunshine just does not make up, for missing family we have had some good and bad experiences here, in hindsight though I would never of moved and put myself and my OH through this heartache..... wish I had been content with what I had before. Just as in the words of that song!!!

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    Sadie no life experience is wasted. Coming here has clarified what you feel about your rellies and your life. You would never have known this if you had stayed in the Uk. Many people move somewhere else and then move back to where they came from. The only thing is you will not be the same person as you were before you moved and if you return there will always be a lttle piece of you that is stamped Australia. despite living here for ages there is a part of me that will always be English, but I'm not really except by citizenship and about 15 years clocked up in my life, then again I'm not Australian either. Once you uproot you will have a foot in both camps. There is nothing wrong with hindsight, but you only get it through experience whether good, middling or bad.

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    Guest nishman
    The only thing is you will not be the same person as you were before you moved and if you return there will always be a lttle piece of you that is stamped Australia.

    Very true and goes a long way to explain the ping-pong syndrome.

    Wise words from Rachiegarlo:notworthy:

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    Guest mollybailey

    we arrived 1st Feb this year in some seriously hot weather, first few weeks were a daze as both my daughter and i ended up (seperately) in hospital me on their 7th birthday so far it is definately ups and downs, we said the same as you but said will give it 2 years,it is hard, the trouble is the kids will want to stay as they do already, today i want to go back, but tomorrow may be different, i miss friends and family but seeing the kids so happy makes me want to stick it out,

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    Guest mollybailey

    it all depends on you as a person,

    how much you moved around in UK etc etc etc etc

    I think the place is lovely so many landscapes and beaches it is endless, the people are so so friendly and i enjoy the slowed down lifestyle, but when you have lived in the same place all your life, it takes time to adjust! we all came here for different reasons and some may not have found what they were looking for, our reasons were the children, for them to have a more fulfilled life and not sitting watching tv and playstations and wII and that is what we have had so far, so when i said in previous comment, today i want to go back, im changing my mind yet again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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    Guest Trakki

    I think as everyone said that it is an individual thing. We came with no expectations (or money) at all but just with the thought that it couldn't be worse than what we had in the UK. We were talking about this the other day and think that if we had stayed we would have been in dire straights financially now,possibly having lost our house. Here we have just had my wage and have found things a lot easier. This will change now as we didn't figure me getting pregnant and losing my wage as I have not been here long enough for mat pay! Yes we miss family (and I know I will miss my mums support when baby is born and Pete has to work leaving me the day after baby born to get the kids to school!!!) but I often think I am hard hearted as I don't miss them to the extent that I want to go back, this could possibly be because our closest relative was 2.5 hours away so we didn't see them much anyway.

     

    Our oldest was bullied at school and the school told me it was my problem no theirs, he was introverted and alot of the time unhappy. not wanting to go to school. Here he is sooooooooo happy he is a different boy. He didn't want to make the move and was constantly telling us that when he turned 18 (he is 8) he wouldmove back to the UK, asked him about this the other day and he said 'why would I want to go back THERE!!!'

     

    So for us and certainly our son, (all the other children are happy too but to young to really appreciate what we have done) there are no regrets. Just wish we didn't have to wait another 18 months to sell our house in the UK as it is a bit of a pain to be honest. We love it here and have a far better quality of life and far better family life than we ever had.

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    Guest JulieG

    YES, I feel the same. Been here for 18 months. Husband and sons love it. I would go back tomorrow. I aslo feel like living in 'The Land that Time Forgot'. Sorry to everyone out there that loves it, but each to their own.

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    weve been here over 3 years now and are very happy.we never done a reccie or visited before just turned up blind,not a lot of money.jamie was 2 so he knew no different i was lucky to get a job straight away.we rented a house for a year then bought one then had a baby and just got on with it.we are still waiting for the homesickness to kick in,we miss family a bit but not as much as maybe we should heartless who knows.i feel for people that struggle, we have come across a few who came over when we did but speak to them now and they are well settled.good luck to everyone.cheers mark.

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    Guest Allybinoz42

    I have been here 7 years and can say that the homesickness doesn't go away, it changes. It doesn't feel as urgent and you get used to it. But it hasn't lessened for me personally. I realise now what a close family I have in England, only by being 13,000km away, did that come into focus!

     

    I find that, yes, I am now Australian and English so returning would never be the same as before. I value the pace of life and peace that Adelaide offers. I constantly think about going back but don't know how realistic that would be. I have been spoiled by Australia, but miss my family a lot, especially after the euphoria of the first few years wore off.

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    Guest Deb17

    Now, this is going to surprise some, but I couldn't honestly answer yes or no to this. :unsure:Maybe this is partly to do with having finally found work or perhaps just to do with the three year mark that is fast approaching. Some of the people who've contributed to this thread have made very thought-provoking comments. Yes, you do miss your family and friends if you were really close - I know I do. But personally, we came out here for our boys, although their quality of life hasn't really changed much, because they were already older when we arrived. I still believe that if your kids are younger the move is actually easier because they adapt to change more rapidly and just get on with it, in addition to which there are plenty of fab beaches for them to play on for free! I still very much regret giving up my job in the UK, and the salary that went with it, but the more I think about my future here; growing older in a warmer climate and in a relatively safe place, the more I realise that I could not go back permanently. Australia has already left its mark.

    One really good point about being here too...although my kids go to bog standard public schools, I don't have to worry about them getting stabbed, mugged or abducted during their school day! :goofy:

    I'm now looking forward to the day when I can take my Aussie grandchildren for a picnic at the local beach.

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    Guest mollybailey

    my son and daughter are 7 and like your son hated us for taking him away, but he doesnt want to go back either,good luck with the new baby!

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    Guest marty

    Over 30 years and I dont regret 1 day, hang in there it will get better and one day you will wonder why you did not move here 20 years earlier

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