cormcvcr

That's how the fight started!!!!

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    When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace

    > expensive.....so, I took her to a gas station.... and that's how the

    > fight started....

    >

    > *********************************************************

    >

    >

    > I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for

    > $14.95.Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95. I told her

    the

    > beer would make her look better at night than the cold cream. And

    that's

    > how the fight started.

    >

    >

    ************************************************************************

    >

    > After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for

    Social

    > Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's

    license

    > to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my

    > wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would

    have

    > to go home and come back later. The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'.

    > So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That

    > silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she

    > processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly

    > told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She

    > said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten

    > disability, too'. And that's how the fight started.....

    >

    >

    ***********************************************************************

    >

    > My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I

    > kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at

    a

    > nearby table. My wife asked, 'Do you know her?' 'Yes,' I sighed,

    'She's

    > my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we

    > split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober

    since.'

    > 'My God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on

    > celebrating that long?' And that's how the fight started.....

    >

    >

    ***********************************************************************

    >

    > I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road

    > and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes

    > you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah,

    > well I couldn't believe it.... he was a DWARF!!! He stormed over to my

    > car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT HAPPY!!!' So, I looked

    down

    > at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?' And that's how the

    > fight started.....

    >

    >

    ************************************************************************

    > I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my

    > order first. 'I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.' He

    said,

    > 'Aren't you worried about the mad cow?' 'Nah, she can order for

    > herself.' And that's how the fight started.....

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